


Warmth

by orphan_account



Category: ASTRO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drinking, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Minor Moon Bin/Park Minhyuk | Rocky, Mutual Pining, One Night Stands, Slow Burn, a lot of drinking, because people have sex while drunk, eunwoo's a model, eunwoo's a pretty boy and he has to deal with that, jinwoo's self-conscious about himself, myungjun's a musical theatre major because he's gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:28:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25692082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: He thought Jinwoo didn’t seem exceptional, not at first, unless you got close to him. The moment he pulled you in though, you were a moth and he was candlelight. His warmth, inside and out, his sincerity, the way love shined in his eyes, radiated off him, that made you feel calm and happy, it was something Dongmin had never experienced before.
Relationships: Lee Dongmin | Cha Eunwoo/Park Jinwoo | Jin Jin
Comments: 11
Kudos: 49





	Warmth

**Author's Note:**

> This is 26k of self-indulgent jincha. This was truly an emotional dump for all my jinwoo feelings after a year and a half of not writing anything. I just think that Jinwoo's wonderful and deserves all the love in the world.
> 
> There is a lot of drinking in this fic and people have sex while drunk, which implies dubious content. You've been warned.
> 
> I messed with everyone's ages so that it would make sense for them to be in university together, so here's everyone's birth years:  
> Myungjun: 1995  
> Jinwoo: 1996  
> Dongmin: 1997  
> Bin: 1997  
> Minhyuk: 1997  
> Sanha: 1998
> 
> I initially wasn't going to write the singular sex scene in this fic but it proved necessary imo, so it's here. I wrote this thing in a week, starved of a normal social life, listening to my well-curated gay yearning playlist. This isn't necessary information but I'm giving it to you anyway. Props to all my mutuals on my priv account for putting up with my whining. And to Dilara for listening to me cry about the Joobies even though they don't stan Astro. Don't talk about how much I mention Jinwoo's tiddies and wax poetry about him I already KNOW.
> 
> This doesn't have a beta and I checked the entire thing only once because this is war and I'm an unwilling, senile commander. Enjoy.

Entering the cafeteria, the sound of metal food trays clanking and chatter echoed off the barren walls and into Dongmin’s ears. He noticed some heads turn to look at him but didn’t acknowledge them. This wasn’t to be rude but rather to avoid any confrontation with girls who seem to think his kindness means more, he knew from experience. He saw his group of friends lined up to take their meals and quickly scurried next to them, ignoring the mean looks he got from people at the back of the line.

“Oh, Dongmin-ah,” Myungjun exclaimed, softly touching his arm as an acknowledgement of his presence. “Hi,” he muttered back, looking at Sanha making fun of Jinwoo’s height, a regular occurence. Their little friend group had formed naturally; by meeting the acquaintance of an acquaintance, they had started to hang out together. Considering four of them were, at some capacity, attracted to men, Dongmin thought they were an example of “gays flock together”. It was sort of a mystery how Sanha and Jinwoo had continued hanging out with four art gays, when their prefered activities were video games and fishing. Probably helped that they were also into the arts.  _ Well,  _ he thought,  _ Sanha has explicitly stated he’s straight, but not Jinwoo.  _ Though this wasn’t a brilliant observation, as Jinwoo seemed to show no interest in men nor  _ gay shit  _ as Myungjun would put it. While he did major in music production with a minor in dance, he mainly rapped and did house dance, not areas where queer representation was high in the campus, unlike Myungjun’s musical theatre and Dongmin’s drama.

They got their food and sat at a long table, in their usual formation, with Sanha, Minhyuk and Dongmin on one side and Jinwoo, Myungjun and Bin on the other. Their chatter joined the rest of the noise in the cafeteria as Dongmin shoved some rice in his mouth. He wondered how one could make rice so mediocre. 

Myungjun almost toppled over laughing at something Jinwoo had said and Jinwoo steadied him, trying to swallow the food in his mouth. Myungjun, Sanha and Jinwoo were closer friends with each other, as was Bin and Minhyuk. Dongmin was sort of the outlier but it didn’t bother him- he was grateful to even have a circle of friends after his boring high school life, where his only friends were Mingyu and Seokmin, determined the “handsome unapproachable boy” then by his peers. He was never the one to deny his looks, but he opted to say he was  _ conventionally attractive _ , nothing more, nothing less. 

Perhaps because of other’s affinity to look at him and just think that he’s  _ handsome _ , he had slowly started finding beauty in unconventional places. He found that unconventional beauty, once noticed, was even more captivating than anything the general population would agree on. Thus, he concluded himself as conventionally attractive, which took nothing from others differing charms and attractiveness. He inwardly thanked his mom once again, for raising him with the mindset that his looks, while an asset, never put him above others.

Though, this clearly wasn’t what people thought. He was always put on a pedestal by others and this made it hard for Dongmin to make friends, which in turn made him look cold and unapproachable. He was glad Myungjun was a fearless extrovert that took him into his friend group. He had taken a liking to talking to Dongmin whenever their classes matched or when he saw him in the school corridors, perhaps having noticed that Dongmin didn’t have many people to talk to. He had introduced him to Jinwoo first, and then he had slowly met the other four. He remembered seeing Jinwoo for the first time, with a snapback, hoodie and jeans on- he definitely looked like he rapped. Although, contrasting his clothing, his demeanor was far from  _ cool _ and  _ being swaggy _ .  _ Puppy,  _ was Dongmin’s first reaction to meeting him.  _ An overexcited puppy. _ It was endearing. It was also very easy to be friends with the two. He later noticed that they calmed down (Jinwoo a lot more than Myungjun) when they weren’t together- which was a rare occurrence. Dongmin envied their relationship- he had never gotten the chance to be so close to another person, let alone be, like, soulmates.

His eyes lingered on the two as he continued eating his food. 

“... min. Dongmin-ah!” Bin’s voice startled him, as he pulled his eyes away from the overexcited duo to the man in front of him. “Yeah, Binnie?”

“I was  _ asking _ whether you’d come to a party this weekend. Eunbi is throwing it at a- was it an abandoned factory, or something like that. It’s going to be fun, you should come.”

Dongmin was never the one for parties. He didn’t consider himself a good dancer and his socializing skills, unless he was with people he knew, were subpar at best. Though a change in his routine could be nice, he wasn’t booked this weekend anyway.

“Who else is coming?”

“Well, everyone here, of course. Mostly dance students probably, though there will be quite a few drama and musical theatre majors. There’s probably going to be a dance competition, or a performance of some sorts, Eunbi didn’t mention much.”

_ Everyone here _ , Dongmin thought to himself. It wouldn’t hurt to spend some time with his friends as he had been busy for the last two get-togethers they’d spontaneously arranged.

“Sure, I’ll come. Do I need to bring anything?”

“I don’t think so, I’m sure the news of you coming will attract a lot of girls and Eunbi is planning to charge freshmen 20,000 won, so she’ll be happy and won’t bother me so much to help.”

Dongmin smiled slightly as Bin took out his phone to text the news to his friend. His eyes drifted back to Jinwoo, who was heatedly debating something with Sanha. He heard phrases like  _ mana _ ,  _ stamina  _ and other terms he couldn’t quite understand and guessed they were talking about a video game.

“What’s up?” Minhyuk asked from next to him, his tray already cleared and his brow arched. “Hm?” Dongmin replied, unaware of what he was asking.

“You keep staring,” Minhyuk gestured towards Jinwoo, grabbing a tissue in his hand and ripping it slowly.

“Oh, I didn’t mean to,” Dongmin replied slowly, shooting another look at Jinwoo who was nudging Myungjun with his shoulder, annoying him about something. Minhyuk shot a quizzical look at him, shaking his leg. His energy was spilling out of him now that he had a full stomach. “Sure, buddy.”

It was Dongmin’s turn to shoot a quizzical look at Minhyuk, who had a smirk on his face. “What are you insinuating, Minhyuk-ssi?”

“Nothin’ much,” Minhyuk replied, winking at Dongmin and throwing the meticulously ripped tissue on the table. “Come on Bin-ah, we have to be in the practice room in, like, twenty minutes.”

Bin looked at Minhyuk with shocked eyes while he had his tray in his hand, scooping up the last pieces of his rice. “Okay, okay, fine,” he mumbled, continuing stuffing his already full mouth.

The party date slowly creeped up on Dongmin, who was buried in textbooks about acting history and his demonstrative classes. This week, it seemed, it was the goal of the Improv Club to recruit him which he first dismissed, then kindly refused, then had to harshly refuse, putting forward his job as an excuse. It wasn’t a complete lie: his modelling job, coupled with university work was quite tiring. He knew they would talk behind him, saying he thought he was better than them for being handsome and having made a career out of it. At some point Dongmin had accepted the fact that he would easily look evil in people’s eyes because of his looks. He learned to look past it or at least, ignore it enough that it didn’t disturb his sleep.

When the party day arrived, he took a taxi to the party location, which was an abandoned warehouse that had been repurposed as a for-rent party space. It had an arch as an entry way surrounded by vines and the old building was surrounded by a fence so that there was a garden area as well. The lighting was done by overhanging small light bulbs, which gave the outside area a cozy feel- furthered by the fact that there was a small table with a gingham cover and bean bags thrown around. Dongmin had to show his university ID to the bouncer at the door, which looked out of place in such a cozy garden.

He noticed that the inside of the building was vastly different to the outside. It was mostly barren, with long tables on each side lined with booze and cups. Towards the middle, people were dancing to the booming music coming from the big speakers in each corner. At the end of the building, there was a stage that would be used for performances later in the evening.

A lot of people had already trickled into the building and more kept coming. Dongmin adjusted his fleece jacket in the big room that was already beginning to look suffocating. 

“Dongmin! Over here!” 

Dongmin turned his attention to the voice he barely heard over the music. It was Bin, Minhyuk and Eunbi near the tables, presumably getting booze. When he walked over, Bin greeted him by hitting his back and resting his arm on his shoulders. “Hi, everyone. Hi Eunbi.”

“Great, now that you’ve arrived, freshmen will start texting. You should stand in a place where people can see you. Maybe we should even make you the host for the performances,” Eunbi said quickly, looking like her mind was going a mile an hour. 

“Why only freshmen?” Dongmin questioned.

“Because the sophomores and the rest already know you have no interest in dating- or at least, dating women. The freshmen have no idea so they’re willing to pay up. I paid for the booze from the student association’s emergency money and if I don’t put it back they’ll have my head.”

She then took Dongmin by his arm and turned him around to face the dance floor, waving at a friend. “He’s here!” she shouted and her friend gave her a thumbs up enthusiastically, going further into the dance floor to talk to other girls.

“Don’t forget to stand in places where you’ll be visible, okay? I’ve gotta check in with Sojung.” She then left, running across the concrete floor of the building.

Dongmin laughed and turned to Bin and Minhyuk. 

“Come on Hyuk-ah, you never drink! I’m determined to see you drunk today.”

“I just don’t like it Binnie. Stop it.” He playfully shoved Bin, who didn’t budge an inch.

“What if we got you punch? It’s fruity and easy to drink, trust me, you’ll like it.” Minhyuk rolled his eyes at the taller man. “Fine, whatever, or else you’re not going to shut up.”

Bin held Minhyuk by his wrist, dragging him to where the punch bowl was. “Oh, Dongmin, you should get something to drink too! This table will probably be empty by 12.”

Dongmin checked his phone. It was 9 pm. He gave a thumbs up as Bin continued to drag Minhyuk. He set about to mix soju and beer for himself. At least his alcohol tolerance was high. 

He drank half his cup and stared around, seeing Minhyuk wince at the taste of the punch and then relax while Bin laughed at him, punching his arm. A song with a trumpet sound began to echo off the walls of the barren building. Dongmin downed his cup and mixed himself another one, hoping the alcohol would help him be more sociable for tonight. He grabbed his cup and started walking towards the other end of the building. He spotted Myungjun and Jinwoo. They were near the stage, chatting about something. Myungjun threw his head back and cackled at Jinwoo, who was also laughing. 

“Hiya,” he butted in, a smile on his face. A Simon Dominic song started playing.

They acknowledged him back as Dongmin took a swig from his cup. Under the hot lights shining from the stage, Dongmin took his jacket off and rested it on his forearm. He looked at Jinwoo who was still chatting with Myungjun. He was wearing a black bucket hat, a puffy jacket and chunky white shoes with holo linings.

“Are you going to perform tonight?”

“Yeah, I prepared a small routine.”

“I’m sure it’ll be great.” 

“Huh?” Jinwoo shouted, unable to hear from the loud music.

“I’m sure it’ll be great!” Dongmin leaned in and shouted, which earned him a small smile from Jinwoo and a thumbs up.

At that moment, the music stopped and the sound of a microphone being grabbed filled the room.

“Hello everyone! Welcome to the Dance Department Student Association’s Spring Party.” Eunbi announced from the stage, her sequin overall shining under the stage lights. The party-goers clapped and wooed.

“We’re going to have a total of six performances by different members of the faculty tonight. Make some noise for them!” The crowd once again shouted, a random person shouting “Go, Jinah!” at the end. 

“Our first performer of the night is Park Jinah and Kang Seungyeon!”

Eunbi left the stage and two women in black outfits got on. The lights dimmed as they got into position, then two spotlights shone on both as the music started. They were dancing to a sexy trap song, mostly on the floor and then, on each other. It was very sensual and the story, Dongmin determined, was two succubi enchanting the viewer. The crowd collectively ooh-ed when they pulled off a move where the first girl slid between the legs of the other and then did a backflip, holding onto the other. As the song came to a close, one of them did the splits as the other crawled over her, making a monstrous shape with their bodies. When the song ended the crowd cheered and shouted. It was definitely a great performance.

“When are you gonna go?” Dongmin leaned down and asked.

“Presumably,” he dragged the last syllable, “now.”

“Thank you to Jinah and Seungyeon for that sexy performance! Next up, Park Jinwoo, make some noise!”

“Good luck!” Dongmin and Myungjun shouted as Jinwoo made his way into the stage area as Eunbi left and lights dimmed.

Jinwoo was crouched near where the stage ended when the lights shot up. He was also not wearing his jacket and only had a loose muscle tee on. A fast paced house song started and Jinwoo jumped up. He started doing complicated footwork that shone even more with his flashy shoes. 

What captured Dongmin’s attention was the traces of a tattoo on Jinwoo’s chest. It wasn’t entirely shocking that Jinwoo had a tattoo, it was something he would do and he remembered conversations about him getting one in their group chat a couple months ago. He had mostly forgotten about it though, until now. 

Dongmin watched the entire three minute performance fixated on Jinwoo. His hard work and determination showed in the routine and his small build complemented the dance in Dongmin’s opinion. He didn’t look lanky or out of place. In a loose black tank top, baggy black sweatpants with lots of pockets, his white feet moving at an immense pace, his bucket hat hiding half of his face and his middle parted hair, with the tips of a big tattoo showing on his well-built chest, he looked mesmerizing. 

He also incorporated some b-boy moves into his dance, or maybe some b-boy moves were already a part of house dance, Dongmin didn’t know much about it. He stood on one hand and grabbed the tip of his shoe with the other then body-rolled off the ground. He did his final footwork and then stood on the stage, breathing wildly, his head tipped down but his posture straight and daring. The lights dimmed once again and Jinwoo scurried off the stage.

“Put your hands together for Jinwoo!” Eunbi announced from the stage as Jinwoo made his way back down where Myungjun and Dongmin were standing. He collapsed on the white plastic chair next to them.

“That was really good,” Dongmin told the exhausted boy after pulling a chair to sit next to him with Myungjun. 

“Thanks,” Jinwoo answered, a small smile on his face as he hit Dongmin’s knee. 

“That was so good! It was so much more than what you showed me before! As expected, Park Jinwoo!”

Myungjun hit Jinwoo on the arm while Jinwoo continued to breathe heavily. He nudged Myungjun and smiled at him. 

“You got a tattoo?” Dongmin asked as the next performer took the stage.

“Yeah, I got it like…” Jinwoo trailed off, “a month ago? Two months ago? Something like that.” He was still heaving.

“Can I see it?” Dongmin turned his upper body towards Jinwoo. He thought he saw redness on Jinwoo’s cheeks, but that was probably because of his performance. “Uh, sure.” 

Jinwoo pulled his tanktop down a little further, revealing the tattoo of a lion in a crown silhouette. Myungjun leaned over. “Ah yes you’re looking at, as I like to call it, the straightest tattoo ever!”

“Hey!” Jinwoo laughed and lightly punched Myungjun. “I’m gonna have this on my body forever, you know?”

“Yes, and this doesn’t exempt it from being the straightest tattoo ever. Come on Jinwoo-yah, I know you like fishing but you’re collecting straight trophies at this point.” Myungjun doubled over laughing. “Fuck you,” Jinwoo trailed off, laughing with him.

“I think it fits you,” Dongmin mused. It was a pretty heterosexual tattoo in taste (what with the photorealistic lion) but it suited Jinwoo’s aura somehow.

“Thank you. See not everyone thinks that way,” Jinwoo motioned to Dongmin while looking at Myungjun. “No, it’s still a really straight tattoo,” Dongmin chuckled and Myungjun laughed again. 

“You’re never living this down,” Myungjun told him, wiping tears from his eyes. Jinwoo slumped back to his seat, fake-pouting.

_ So is Jinwoo straight? _

Someone from the crowd called for Myungjun’s name and he got up, waving over to the man. 

“Do you have any other tattoos?” Dongmin asked as the loud music of an EDM song continued blaring.

“Yeah, one on my side. It’s reminders for myself.” 

He lifted up his tank top, this time without any prompts, to reveal four sentences on his ribs.

“I heard ribs hurt.”

“Kinda. It wasn’t unbearable. My chest…” he extended the last syllable, “was easier, yeah. Even though it was bigger. Yeah.”

“Cute,” Dongmin giggled a little.

“Huh?” Jinwoo turned to him, eyes wide.

“Your slowness. It’s cute. It makes me focus on your voice.” Dongmin explained. He wondered whether he would’ve been able to say this if he didn’t have alcohol in his body.

Jinwoo ducked his head down. “Oh, yeah. Thanks,” he played with the edges of his tank top. “How about we go outside after I get my jacket? I need fresh air,” he continued. Dongmin shook his head yes and slowly got up. He had finished his cup watching the show and he was a bit woozy.

Jinwoo grabbed his puffy white jacket from backstage and started to walk back to where Dongmin was as a girl approached said man. 

“Hello, Dongmin-ssi, right? I’m Yoon Seokyeong. I'm a first year at the dance department. I wanted to ask whether I could have your number?” A petite girl with big, shining eyes asked Dongmin. She was holding her phone towards Dongmin, her fingers on the other end, kindly waiting.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t Seokyeong-ssi. Hope you have a nice night.” Dongmin bowed a little, looking back at Jinwoo and starting to walk to the exit together. He saw from the corner of his eye that the girl’s friends surrounded her. He could’ve given his number, out of politeness, but it would give false hope and Dongmin didn’t think anyone needed that. 

When they got out, Dongmin took a big breath of fresh air after an hour in the building with the smell of sweat, booze and, just,  _ warmth. _ He saw Jinwoo do the same.

“Do you have to do that a lot?” Jinwoo asked.

“Sometimes. Towards the end of the school year, I guess people go into a “if I don’t do it now, I will regret it” mindset and I have to do it a lot more.” He looked at the small light bulbs still illuminating the garden. It was much more quiet here. Dongmin’s ears rung.

Jinwoo shook his head, stared at his feet and kicked a pebble. “Let’s sit,” he walked and seated himself on a bean bag, coat still in his hand. Dongmin sat next to him. There was a group of three people on the other end of the garden with cups in their hands.

“Your performance really was amazing, hyung.” Dongmin looked back at Jinwoo who was wiping his sweat with tissues. Under bright lights he could see that his face was nearly all red and that he was still catching his breath. His wavy, middle parted hair had stuck to his face. His chest shone with sweat.

“Oh, thanks. It was actually an old routine that I…” he trailed off, “polished a bit. Eunbi said she’d take anything, so.” He continued wiping at his forehead and took his hat off. His fair fell flat on his head.

“How did you start house dance? It must be pretty niche.”

“There was a dance school near our home when I was growing up. They did a lot of classic shit, like tango and ballroom dancing but they had a contemporary class as well. I learnt it there. I was around…” he trailed off, “twelve. My mom also approved and supported me a lot. She’s actually the one that said most of the phrases in my tattoo.”

“Oh, I couldn’t see what they said inside. Can I read them?”

“Sure.” Jinwoo lifted his top once again to show his tattoo. Dongmin leaned in, reading the English sentences. He unconsciously brang his hand up and wiped his thumb around the tattoo, which made Jinwoo shiver.

“I- I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-”

“No, it’s fine. I just- didn’t expect it.”

Dongmin nodded and let go of Jinwoo.

“ _ Play with the process _ ? What’s that one for?”

“Means I should always have fun with what I’m doing. Have fun during the process. I think you can make just about anything fun if you want to, but sometimes I have to remind myself that.”

“That’s cool. You get your tattoos for yourself only.”

“Well, yeah, I guess. The intention of a lion in a crown on my chest seems obvious. But I also like how ink looks.”

“I think it contrasts your personality nicely. Like, you’re an overexcited puppy but when it comes to your work, or presence, you can be a lion with a crown.”

Jinwoo looked at Dongmin, his brows high, a big smile on his face. “Overexcited puppy?” He laughed and sank into the bean bag. Dongmin blushed slightly. He definitely wouldn’t have said that if not for the alcohol.

“Well, yeah. That was the first thing I thought when I met you.”  _ Oh god, you’re oversharing. _

Jinwoo continued laughing. “That’s good. A couple of people in my life have said that actually, but it’s nice to hear it from you Dongmin-ah.”

Dongmin chuckled and turned his head. There was a moth hitting one of the lightbulbs.

“What did you think when you first saw me?” he asked back.

Jinwoo paused for a moment and pouted. “Well, uhm…” he trailed off, his eyes unfocused like they did every time he thought about something while talking. “That you looked kind. And that you’re handsome, of course.” 

“I looked kind?”

“Yeah, you just gave off a… comfortable aura. Like you’d be kind to me.”

Dongmin looked at Jinwoo with big eyes. “That’s really nice to hear. I always had this complex that I look unapproachable.”

“If you did look unapproachable, girls wouldn’t be asking your number directly, they’d be asking from your friends.”

Dongmin entertained that thought in his head. Maybe he didn’t look as cold as he thought he did. He thought about the cold bad boy tropes in webtoons and didn’t think he fit into the category. He was more like the second male lead in personality.

“I guess so.”

A wind passed by. It carried the smell of the flowers that were lined around the garden. Dongmin shivered slightly.

“You should wear your jacket,” Jinwoo motioned towards the fleece in his hand. Dongmin did as he was told. “You should too, you’re sweaty, you could catch a cold.”

“I guess. But I’m just a naturally warm person. Think I’ll be fine.”

Dongmin looked at him, questioning.

“Look,” Jinwoo moved to hold Dongmin’s hands in between his own. “I’m really warm.”

He was indeed very warm. As was the smile he shot at him, with his eyes nearly closed.

“Yeah, you are.”

Dongmin thought about their circumstances. If they were a guy and a girl in an anime, cherry blossoms would be flying around them with romantic music in the background. But they were instead Dongmin, with his unfamiliarity with affection and Jinwoo, a guy that, by all standards, seemed to be straight.

Jinwoo moved back as another wind blew. “My mom always says that I’m like a furnace. MJ-hyung shoves his hands in my armpits whenever he’s cold.” Jinwoo laughed slightly.

Dongmin leaned on his knees with his elbows.  _ You really are warm, inside and out. _

“Did you drink tonight?” he opted to ask, instead of furthering his thought process.

“Oh, no. I was going to be on stage, plus me and alcohol… we’re not a good combination. I can’t even take it well. I’m quite the lightweight.” He paused and put his coat on. “You seem like you can handle it though.”

“Yeah, it takes me quite a lot to get drunk. Not the most ideal, to be honest, because I’ve gotta pay more.” Jinwoo smiled.

“Do you like your drunk self?”

“I guess I like getting drunk. I’ve never been blackout drunk before. When I’m tipsy I just say things without thinking it over. Sometimes that’s a good thing, sometimes bad. You?”

“Oh, I hate drunk me. It takes me, like… one bottle of soju to get nearly blackout drunk. I was serious when I said I was a lightweight!” Dongmin laughed. “I do… a lot of things. I act on every impulse I have. It’s terrifying. I haven’t gotten drunk in years.”

“I can’t imagine you with MJ-hyung like that.”

“It’s a disaster. Last time we got drunk together… you know how they eat food off of naked people? Yeah, hyung ate pizza off of me. At least we were alone or I don’t want to imagine what would’ve happened.” Dongmin bursted laughing.

“It was funny to me too until we woke up and saw our phones. Hyung had made it his wallpaper. There was a video of him speaking nonsense like it was English and acting as if he was shooting a documentary. It was awful.” Dongmin couldn’t stop laughing. He held his aching stomach and leaned back.

“Shut up! It really was awful. I’m so lucky nobody saw those.”

“So, did you delete everything?” Dongmin asked in between his laughter. 

“Of course! I made sure hyung deleted all of them too. Permanently. There was one where he was- I won’t get into the details.” Jinwoo laughed and covered his face.

“What, what, what? What is it?” Dongmin asked, laughter still in his eyes.

“He-” Jinwoo started but couldn’t continue as he had a laughing fit. “He put- two circles of pineapples around my ni- nipples. He-” he continued laughing as Dongmin threw himself on the ground. “There was a video where he- he acted like a dude seeing boobs for the first time, it was so funny.”

“Oh my god, wish you hadn’t deleted them, that sounds amazing.” Dongmin wiped tears off his eyes once again.

“Oh god no. I’d be mortified. I wouldn’t show my face again.”

“It’d be worth the laugh.”

Jinwoo chuckled. “Maybe.”

The door to the building opened and more people trickled into the garden. Dongmin reasoned the performances must’ve ended. Myungjun was also in the crowd.

“Hey! I’ve been looking for you two!” Myungjun walked over to them. “People are talking about your performance Jinwoo-yah. A lot of freshmen were impressed!”

Jinwoo smiled and ducked his head down. “Oh really?”

“Yeah! Some girls asked me for your number so that you could tutor them.” Myungjun laughed as he talked. Jinwoo punched him in the arm. “I’m serious!”

Dongmin smiled at the duo. “I’m gonna go get something to drink, do you two want anything?”

“Can you get me a cup of punch?” Myungjun peeked up.

“Sure.” Dongmin walked back into the stuffy building that smelled like sweat. He walked over to the table. There was still some booze left. Dongmin mixed himself beer and soju again and made his way over to the punch bowl. He saw some movement in his peripheral vision and looked over.

It was Minhyuk and Bin, leaned against a wall, making out. Dongmin wasn’t sure if he was shocked. Bin’s body blocked out the shorter man from Dongmin’s view, but he could see his eyes and hair. Minhyuk’s hands were on Bin’s cheeks and there was a desperateness flowing from him.

Dongmin shook his head, grabbed the two cups and walked back outside. He gave Myungjun his drink and sat back in his old place. Jinwoo had leaned over and was sitting on the edge of the bean bag. His puffy jacket enveloped him and made him look even smaller than normal. Dongmin downed half his cup again.

Myungjun continued his banter with Jinwoo and another guy who had joined them. Dongmin didn’t know who he was. Then Bin and Minhyuk bursted out of the building, Minhyuk pulling Bin by his wrist. They made their way over to the little group.

“Hey guys. Bin somehow managed to spill the entire punch bowl on himself so we’re gonna leave. See you later.” Their lips were both shiny and red, hair tousled. Bin’s thin white t-shirt was entirely soaked and the red tinge of the drink was visible. It was dripping off of him. Minhyuk pulled him towards the exit again and Bin absentmindedly followed. Dongmin looked back at his friends and locked eyes with Myungjun. At that moment, they both knew that the other had seen what had happened. 

The night continued on with Myungjun being the life of the party and Jinwoo going along with all his jokes and banter. Dongmin mostly watched his surroundings, his vision slightly woozy, his head floating a little and the overhead light bulbs twinkling prettily. 

During the week, Dongmin was booked for a slightly higher budget advertisement of sunglasses. With spring approaching, he was brought to a seaside location and posed in a convertible car. The shoot thankfully only lasted one day. Dongmin went back to his apartment exhausted. He made himself cup ramen, knowing it would affect his skin, and scrolled through his emails. Exam season was approaching and he didn’t feel ready. He had to prepare a monologue for a performative class. He hadn’t chosen which play yet but he was considering Chekov or, if he could find a translated version, the musical  _ Hadestown _ he had heard so much about.

Every lunch, he could sense the tenseness between Bin and Minhyuk, although they still got along just like they did before. There were pauses, sometimes, when Minhyuk touched Bin’s arm or when Bin picked up fluff from Minhyuk’s jacket. 

“What’s up?” Dongmin decided to tease Minhyuk.

“Hm? What do you mean?” 

Dongmin motioned to the man sitting opposite them, joking with Myungjun about something.

”There’s a new vibe around you two.”

Minhyuk scoffed. “Huh! What do you mean a- a new vibe? We’re like we’ve always been. That’s dumb. Why would you say that?”

Dongmin shrugged. “Sure, buddy.”

Minhyuk glared at him. Dongmin thought it was funny that they thought they were being slick when nearly all of the dance department and their entire friend circle had seen them make out. He laughed.

“Maybe you should shoot that eye smile at Mr. Oblivious over there.” Minhyuk mocked him and left the table. Dongmin shook his head. Bin’s eyes immediately followed Minhyuk as he left. “Hey! Hyuk-ah! Wait for me!”

Dongmin and Myungjun laughed at the two. 

Yes, Jinwoo was pretty oblivious. Dongmin had admitted to himself that he was somewhat attracted to Jinwoo, but it was normal, right? He was kind, understanding and fun. He was also well-built, hardworking and just at the right height for hugs. It would be abnormal if he  _ didn’t  _ find him attractive. But it was just that. He was an attractive friend.

A week later, the advertisements were out and a lot of them were plastered around campus. Dongmin was shocked to see them on campus but it was to be expected. University students were a target demographic, after all.

He could hear some people whisper about the advertisements, or do double checks when he walked past one. He was used to it at this point, though it was weird for him to see his own face everywhere, constantly. He would have to get used to it if he was going to become a celebrity.

Dongmin didn’t think of fame as a goal but rather a side-effect of the job he wanted to do, that he knew he  _ could _ do and would earn a good sum for. He had always been attracted to acting and the theatrical arts and his career path had formed naturally. He could’ve signed into an agency and directly started working but he determined getting an education in the work he wanted to do would turn out better results for him. He wouldn’t feel incapable or inferior, at the very least.

He was spending a lot more time with Jinwoo and approached to chat with him whenever he got the chance. It was fun to spend time with Jinwoo and see him be shy sometimes. Seeing him eat well and have fun made Dongmin happy. He was trying to be a good friend, that’s all. He bought him lunch and invited him over to the library so they could study together.

In their next lunch, Sanha asked him about the posters. “Oh, hyung! Your face is everywhere on campus! Did you ask them specifically to put them here?” he teased. Dongmin looked at him with big eyes, threatening violence.

“Do you think I would do such a thing?” he laughed along. 

“I think it’s nice that you’re already building a name for yourself,” Jinwoo chimed in, his kind smile fixated on his face again.

“Thank you, hyung.”

He saw Myungjun shoot a look at Jinwoo. He didn’t know what it meant. 

  
  


Dongmin was becoming a problem.

He was becoming a problem because he kept shooting his eye smile at Jinwoo when he saw him in the corridors, he kept joking with him and complimenting him on the weirdest shit. It was a problem.

He knew Myungjun had noticed. Hell, probably their entire friend group had noticed. He was being unusually nice to him. Not that he wasn’t a nice person before, he just didn’t call his slowness cute, make fun of his height as much or offer him all his snacks. He didn’t used to sit next to Jinwoo while he waited for his music theory class to start on Wednesdays and walk him to class. He wondered if he thought he was being subtle about his advances. He clearly wasn’t.

This was a problem because he was  _ Lee Dongmin. _ His friend every new acquaintance asked about. The campus sweetheart. The boy already on his way to fame. Jinwoo had seen a couple of his works for his acting degree, he wasn’t a bad actor either. With his good looks and talent, his rise to fame didn’t seem far away.

And Jinwoo? He was a struggling arts student. While some of his work from the very little he put out was being recognized and he was making himself friends in the underground rap circles, he was still just a student. Not many people noticed him on campus, and the very few who did, did because of Myungjun. His romantic endeavors during university hadn’t gone all that well- after his girlfriend of three months had broken up with him in freshman year, he mostly took his frustration off with one-night stands.

They were sitting with Myungjun in the nearest cafe to their campus, waiting for classes to start. Jinwoo was slowly sipping on his americano and going over his notes for his production class. There was a comfortable silence around them, only the noises of the cafe echoing while Myungjun was on his 10 minute cool down before he would become hyper again.

“So, Dongmin likes you.”

Jinwoo dropped his plastic cup on the table and the plastic edge of the straw he was chewing on scraped the roof of his mouth.  _ Ow. _

“I don’t… think so. He’s just being nice to me. It hasn’t been long since we became friends, he’s probably just… trying to spend more time.”

“Oh, come on. It’s been an entire year Jinnie. I know you know too. You don’t have to automatically go on lie-mode.” Jinwoo tried to shoot Myungjun’s amused smile a mean look. He knew he rather looked like a kicked puppy.

“I know you’re thrilled too. Whenever he offers to walk you to class you go-” he ducked his head down and smiled, just like Jinwoo did whenever he was shy. “Oh, sure.” Myungjun fluttered his eyelashes, put his hands together on his lap and smiled. “And then you ruffle your bangs like you do whenever you feel self-conscious. It’s too obvious Jinwoo-yah.”

“Yah! You’re too mean.” Jinwoo pouted and sighed. 

“Aw, did I get under little Jinnie’s skin?” Myungjun drawled his words.

Jinwoo sighed again and dragged his hand down his face, then ruffled his bangs. He didn’t need an analysis of his habits like that. “What do I do, hyung?”

“What do you do? You go confess to him. Seems obvious.”

“Confess?! Are you socially inept?!”

“Hey! If you don’t do it, it won’t take long for him to tell you anyways. And then you can be all lovey-dovey with each other and you can suck him off or something.”

“Hyung! There’s no way. It’s probably just a phase for him.”

“He’s been out as gay for two years, Jinnie. Or well, attracted to men. He told me he doesn’t like labels.”

“No- his attraction to  _ me. _ He’ll get over it. He’s  _ Lee Dongmin _ for fucks sake.”

“And? You’re Park Jinwoo. Have some confidence in yourself, Jinwoo-yah. Also don’t forget to use protection.”

“I hate you sometimes.”

“Oh but you love me.” Myungjun leaned over and snuggled his cheek, kissing him with wet lips. 

“Hyung, let go!”

  
  


They were having lunch, once again. It was a Monday, which meant everyone was tired in one way or another. Weirdly, even Myungjun was a bit calmer than normal, though this meant he was still ninety percent more active than a regular human. Dongmin shoveled some rice into his mouth. Bin and Minhyuk were very quiet as well.

“Hey, why aren’t you two talking?” Dongmin asked. 

“Huh? We had to practice a new routine all weekend and pulled an all-nighter yesterday. I’m exhausted.”

Bin looked up to Minhyuk from where he was sipping his soup from a spoon. Even with his big build, he seemed small today, crouched over, one hand between his thighs.

“Why does he look like a scolded puppy?” Dongmin pointed at Bin with his chopsticks.

Minhyuk looked at Dongmin, then Bin. They both said nothing. Bin ducked his head a little bit more at Minhyuk’s silence. Dongmin shot looks between the two, puzzled, then turned back to his meal.

“You looked so funny back then! You walked like your legs were cramping or like you’d shat your pants!” Myungjun’s voice echoed in the big cafeteria. 

“Hyung, stop it!” Jinwoo mumbled, his mouth filled with food. 

“And you- god, remember the song you wrote for Bokyung? What were the lyrics again?  _ You’re the sunshine in Seoul rain-” _

Jinwoo looked at Myungjun with wide eyes and shoved him, hard. Myungjun toppled back, his breath cut from the elbow to his side.

“Oh my god. Hyung! Hyung, I’m so sorry. Are you okay? Did I hurt you? I clearly did- oh my god.” Jinwoo scrambled to the ground, a bite still in his mouth, his chopsticks thrown on his tray. He helped Myungjun sit up again, though it took some time. Myungjun held his stomach on the floor for a bit, then winced in pain when he sat down. “O-ow.” Myungjun wheezed, a mixture between a laugh and a wince. 

“Hyung!” Jinwoo drawled his syllable. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay? Should we go outside?” 

The bite of food he had taken was smushed in his cheek, his eyes teary, his lips in a pout. He was still carefully holding Myungjun’s arm up, droplets of soup that had splashed visible on the collar of his dark blue shirt. He blinked and a tear dropped down. “I’m sorry.”

Myungjun laughed, his breath back. “Yah, it’s not that serious! Are you crying? Oh my, you crybaby.” Myungjun gave him some tissues.

“I thought I seriously hurt you.” His voice was small, tears falling in small droplets, his nose beginning to sniffle.

_ Oh god.  _ Dongmin thought.  _ I like him. I really, really like him. _

Myungjun continued giving him tissues, hitting his back.

“This friend. He’s always been such a crybaby.” Myungjun looked back at the group as Jinwoo wiped his eyes, his head down, his bangs covering his face.

  
  


After the resolution of that day, Dongmin noticed he had been treating Jinwoo much more differently. He kept worrying whether he was full and whether he had a jacket with him when the last cold winds of Korean weather swept by in late March. He continued to walk him to class whenever he could, gave him food whenever he could and stared at him whenever he thought Jinwoo wouldn’t notice. 

There was a lot he liked about Jinwoo’s face. His kind eyes always sparkled with something akin to love, he found. His big nose didn’t look out of place because of his puppy demeanor and his facial expressions. His lips were shapely and just a little plump, and they complimented his high cheekbones nicely. He liked that Jinwoo had a lot of beauty marks on his face; there were three that formed a line on his cheek, under his lip and on his chin. There was also a small one on his temple.

Whenever they sat at a coffee shop together, or when they were sitting under the big pine tree near the music department waiting for Jinwoo’s class or when they were sitting next to each other in the big library, Dongmin took the chance to stare at him. Each time he did, something about the boy took his breath away. Sometimes it was his hands, that were shorter than Dongmin’s but were bigger and looked so inviting. Sometimes it was the dip of his neck and sometimes his built chest. When the weather warmed up enough to wear t-shirts under jackets, Dongmin had to stop himself from staring at Jinwoo’s pecs every time the wind blew. 

When they walked side by side, Jinwoo came up to Dongmin’s neck. He thought about how nice it would be to hug Jinwoo. He would fit  _ just right.  _ He kept imagining himself holding Jinwoo’s hand as they walked and moving his bangs himself when the wind blew on them. 

He opted to think for just now. Imagine. Imagine how nice it would be to have those eyes filled with love linger on him for hours. How nice it would be to kiss him breathless and make him giggle. How cute it would be for Jinwoo to get on his tiptoes just to reach Dongmin’s face-

“Dongmin-ah?” 

“Yes, hyung?”

“My class is going to start, I’m heading in, all right? You should go home and get some rest, you look tired today.”

“Okay.” Dongmin stood up and started walking to the music department, next to Jinwoo.

“Oh, you’re still going to- okay.”

“Hm?” Dongmin looked at Jinwoo with a smile. 

“Nothing- just thought you’d head straight home.”

“Oh, no. I have to walk you to class. It’s our thing now.”

Jinwoo looked back at Dongmin, eyes wide. They were climbing the stairs now.

“Yeah. MJ-hyung keeps teasing me about it.”

Jinwoo ducked his head in a little and laughed. He tucked a small piece of his bangs behind his ear.

“Do you not like it?” Dongmin looked back at him when they got on the third floor.

“Oh, no. I do.” Jinwoo smiled wide, like he did when someone stared at him.

_ Oh no. I can’t do this anymore. _

The class was at the end of the corridor. They started walking towards it.

“Hey, hyung. What if I treated you to dinner? I still owe you from when you stayed up late at the library with me.”

“Oh.” Jinwoo turned on his heels to face Dongmin. “Uh, sure. We can do it this Friday.”

Dongmin smiled. “Okay. Does samgyeopsal sound good?”

“Ooh, you’re really treating me, huh? Okay, sure. You’ll text me the place.” Jinwoo waved goodbye and walked to his class.

After a nice meal and a night of him treating Jinwoo, he could confess near the Han River. It was quite cliche, but Jinwoo was never the one to run away from them. Dongmin would make sure he’d be comfortable. He walked back to his apartment with a smile on his face and a bounce on his feet.

It was hard to wait for Friday to come. Dongmin had picked out the place, a nice restaurant near the river. They would grill and eat meat and then go out on a walk. Dongmin could also drink a little to ease his nerves.

He kept thinking about Jinwoo. He would be able to do all the things he imagined after this. He could kiss all of his beauty marks, hug him close and dance with him slowly at 3 AM, watch him sleep as moonlight hit his face and they could even go to the beach during the summer. 

There was an undeniable tension between the two of them. Their entire friend group had started teasing them about it. Myungjun kept telling Jinwoo to “go to his boyfriend” whenever he threatened to leave after endless teasing. Minhyuk kept pushing Dongmin onto Jinwoo while they were standing next to each other and running away, like an elementary student. Sanha kept whining that Jinwoo didn’t play enough games with him anymore and instead hung out with his “model boyfriend”. After all that teasing, Jinwoo just laughed it off, but never said anything. That must be his cue, right? He would have objected in some way if he didn’t like Dongmin. 

Friday was slow to arrive, possibly because all Dongmin did was prepare for his written exams and finish some of his performative work. He kept seeing Jinwoo in the meantime and felt giddy whenever he thought about the fact that Jinwoo would look at  _ him _ , him specifically, with those eyes, after his confession.

When Friday evening came, Dongmin was sitting at their reserved table ten minutes earlier than they had agreed to. He had been sitting at his apartment dressed, fixing his hair and making sure his breath didn’t smell for the last two hours and he couldn’t take it anymore. He didn’t mind waiting for Jinwoo, as their days would be filled with each other after this- though the wait did make him a bit more nervous. 

Jinwoo entered the restaurant ten minutes later than their agreed hour, just as Dongmin predicted he would’ve. He was used to the other’s slowness and habit of being late.

“Sorry, Dongmin-ah. I missed my bus at the last minute.” Jinwoo put his black clutch bag on the table. “I was expecting you to be late, to be honest,” Dongmin laughed.

Jinwoo scoffed at him. “Meanie.”

They ordered their meat and Dongmin ordered himself a bottle of beer and soju. 

“How has your week been?”

“You saw me every day, Dongmin-ah. You know how it went.” Jinwoo smiled and turned on the electric grill in front of them. 

“I’m still asking.”

“Fine, I guess. Exams are approaching, you know… I’m trying to prepare and procrastinate at the same time. MJ-hyung keeps bugging me to go clubbing tomorrow. You?” 

“Pretty much the same. I turned down a job for a clothing company. It would clash a lot with my exam schedule, so.”

Jinwoo nodded understandingly. A waiter brought pork belly, rice, other side dishes and booze to their table. The restaurant was quite packed, as it was a Friday night.

Jinwoo excitedly stared at the meat and hovered his hand over the grill to check whether it heated up. Dongmin would offer to grill instead, but Jinwoo was older than him and admittedly better at grilling so he decided to not bring it up.

“Oh, that looks good. I’m hungry. I exercised before coming here.”

“Did you go to the gym?”

“Yeah. I can feel my chest losing it shape, so I should work on it.” Jinwoo put his hand on his chest subconsciously.

_ That would be a shame. _

“Whatever you’re comfortable with. You don’t really like the gym, though.”

“Hm… I guess. I prefer to play around... We’ve been going to play football with MJ-hyung these days. You should come sometime.”

“Sure. Can’t promise I’m good at football though.” 

Determining the grill hot enough, Jinwoo grabbed the meat and started cutting it onto the sizzling oil. Dongmin poured out his beer and soju into a glass and mixed it with a spoon.

“Neither am I, nor MJ-hyung.” Jinwoo laughed. “Practice makes perfect and whatnot.”

Dongmin ate some kimchi.

“When do you usually go?”

“Hm? We don’t really have a set-time. It just happens spontaneously.”

Dongmin sipped on his drink while Jinwoo continued grilling the pork belly with care. A comfortable silence descended upon the table. Dongmin liked these quiet moments with Jinwoo, though he also liked excited Jinwoo. These were the times he could feel Jinwoo was older than him, even if it was by a year.

Jinwoo put some pieces of meat he determined were cooked enough on Dongmin’s bowl. Dongmin took a bite excitedly. “Hm, this is delicious, hyung!” 

Jinwoo smiled at him kindly and ducked his head, continuing to check on the meat. With one piece, Dongmin made a  _ ssam  _ wrap.

“Open your mouth.” He guided his hand to Jinwoo’s mouth. He opened obediently. “It’s good, right?” Jinwoo nodded and continued chewing. 

The evening went on with their comfortable banter. While Jinwoo continued grilling the meat, Dongmin took it upon himself to feed the other. It was comfortable, suited their friendship dynamic. Dongmin felt this was a sign he was moving in the right direction. His stomach fluttered with nerves. 

They finished their meal, and Dongmin finished his drink (he only drank one cup, just enough to break through his nervousness). They sat a bit longer after eating, talking about nothing and everything.

“Hold on.” Dongmin leaned in and fixed a strand of Jinwoo’s hair that had stood up.

“Oh, thanks.” Jinwoo patted the place Dongmin fixed after he leaned back. 

“Do you want a mint?” Dongmin held out a small pack of mint candies he took out from his bag.

“Yeah, thanks.” 

They sat in silence, eating their candies. Dongmin thought it might be a good idea to have their breaths smell nice if- if things went well.

“I’ll go pay and then we can walk along the riverside, if you’d like.” Dongmin proposed, his cheeks slightly red from the alcohol. Definitely just the alcohol. He wondered why Jinwoo thought today was the perfect day to wear a thin white t-shirt under a cardigan and shower just before coming here so that his hair was damp. His breath hitched a bit whenever he caught sight of his chest, the fullness being more apparent with his cardigan on his sides.

“Sure.” 

Dongmin paid and they left, crossing the street and starting their walk. Dongmin fought the urge to hold his hand as they were waiting for the green light and opted to put his hand in front of Jinwoo when a car passed on the red light.

The city lights shone off the water of the Han River, comfortably separating the city into two. He could see couples leaning on the railings, taking pictures and talking. The effects of the small amount of alcohol he took was wearing off.  _ Now or never. _

“Jinwoo-hyung.” Dongmin turned to the shorter man and stopped next to a railing, leaning onto it with his forearms. Jinwoo did the same next to him. 

“Hm?” Jinwoo looked at him expectantly. The streetlights illuminating them sparkled in Jinwoo’s eyes.  _ Pretty. _

Dongmin took a big breath.

“I like you. Would you date me?”

Dongmin smiled a little. There. He had said it. He wondered whether Jinwoo would smile, or maybe even kiss him-

When he turned, he saw confusion in Jinwoo’s eyes, his mouth a frown.

“Dongmin-ah…” Jinwoo backed away a tiny amount, unconsciously. “I- I’m sorry.”

Dongmin had no idea what his current expression was, but he felt his eyes sting with tears.

“I’m- I’m straight.”

“Oh.” Dongmin answered, his voice small. 

Had it all been his imagination? The electricity he felt when their hands brushed together, Jinwoo’s smile he afforded Dongmin in their most intimate moments-

“I’m so sorry, Dongmin-ah.”

“I-it’s fine.” Dongmin swallowed. “I mean it’s not- it’s not something under your control.”

Jinwoo looked at him, his face twisted with worry. 

“You- you should go home, hm? I’m sorry Dongmin.”

Dongmin turned his face away, sniffled and wiped under his nose, then turned back to face Jinwoo.

“Where- where’s your bus stop? I should walk you.”

“It’s fine Dongmin-ah. You should go, really.”

Dongmin looked back at Jinwoo, the wind was hitting his chest again. He wanted to laugh at himself for noticing  _ that _ at this moment.

“Okay.” He paused. “Bye, hyung.”

Dongmin turned with haste and started walking towards his apartment.

Jinwoo turned around on his heels after Dongmin disappeared from his sight. He slowly walked to the bus stop and boarded, sulking. He decided to call Myungjun.

“Hey Jinnie,” his cheerful voice greeted him.

“Hyung,” Jinwoo drawled out, leaning his head against the window and clutching his phone. “He… he confessed. Dongmin. He confessed.”

“And you’re not making out with him right now because…?”

“I rejected him hyung! I- I told him I was straight.”

Silence.

“And why did you do that, you dumbass?”

“Because he- because he’s Lee Dongmin, hyung. We talked about this.”

“Hm, cool. So you’re going to pretend to be straight for the rest of your university life?”

“Hyu-ung,” Jinwoo whined. “I made him cry, hyung. He cried! Oh my god. He must be so sad.”

“Duh you absolute dumb fuck. He just got rejected by the guy he was sure liked him back. Who actually did but for some godforsaken reason decided to lie-”

“Hyung please, I’m feeling shitty enough.” He could feel tears coming. Myungjun sighed from the other end of the call. 

“Do you want me to come over?”

Jinwoo pouted and nodded his head. “Please.”

“Do you want me to buy drinks?”

“Yes, please. Thank you.”

“Okay, I’ll be over in twenty.”

The call beeped. Jinwoo sighed.

  
  


Dongmin, at some point in his walk, slowed down and sat on the pavement. He could hear the river slosh behind him. He hugged his knees close to him. How did it go so wrong?

He thought back to Mingyu’s straight boy crush he had made fun of so much in their junior year. “Hey,” his friend had said, “every gay guy has a straight boy crush at one point or another, okay? Don’t come to me crying when you find yours.”

Perhaps if he hadn’t made fun of him so much he wouldn’t be like this now. He wouldn’t have willfully ignored the fact he had easily acknowledged when he first started talking with Jinwoo; he, by all standards, seemed straight. 

He felt more tears roll down his face. He had never been rejected before because he hadn’t been close enough to anyone to confess his feelings, if there were any. He thought it hurt more than he expected. Especially under circumstances he couldn’t do anything about.

He forced himself off the ground, still sniffling and patted down the ends of the trenchcoat he was wearing. He entered a convenience store on his way home and bought himself four bottles of soju.

“I seriously think you’re the dumbest person I know sometimes.” Myungjun shot a small glass filled with soju back. 

“I know.. I know! But I think I did good.” Jinwoo patted himself on the back, his eyes blinking slowly, limbs moving like jelly. “You did well Jinwoo-yah.”

“Yah! What do you mean you did well? You just rejected the cool, handsome guy whipped for you for no apparent reason!”

“No, he has to get over me. There’s obviously a reason! The reason is that he’s a boy-” Jinwoo sighed and looked at his surroundings from the floor he was sitting on next to a coffee table filled with trash. His head felt like it was floating. “He’s a boy on magazine covers and I’m just- just me.”

“There’s so much wrong with that, I don’t know which one to say. You’re putting him on a pedestal, you know?”

“He was already on that pedestal before we… before we met, hyung. I can’t deal with something like that.”

“Well, you’re bringing yourself down, my friend. You’re also doing a lot with your life, just not the way Dongmin is doing. You should get your head out of your ass and look around. Happiness isn’t all that easy.” Myungjun drank again.

“Uwah, you just sounded so mature, hyung. Wow.”

“I’m always mature, you just never notice.” Myungjun laughed. 

“Mhm, like the time you almost banged a dude backstage? That was real mature of you, hyung-”

“Shush! I’m mature when I need to be.” Myungjun pouted. “Plus, you’re the dumb one today. Are you just going to pretend to be straight for two years, Jinwoo-yah? Going back to the closet, are we?”

Jinwoo had no idea how much he drank but he had the urge to slap himself, so he did.

“God, I’m so duuumb.”

“Yeah, you are. You have to figure something out when you’re not three sheets to the wind. Come on let’s go to bed.” 

It was a regular occurrence for them to sleep together, so they did, once again.

Dongmin was on his tiny balcony, a small luxury in the unorganized housing systems of Seoul. He finished his third bottle, thoroughly drunk by now. He had an assignment he had to finish this weekend but he’d think about it later, when his head wasn’t swimming with alcohol and flashes of Jinwoo.

Why hadn’t he said anything when they teased him about Dongmin being his boyfriend then? Even if he wasn’t one to be ascribed toxic masculine traits, he should’ve dismissed them, just for there to not be misunderstandings. Was Dongmin the dumb one for not clearly seeing that he was straight and taking his silence to heart?

He stared out into the twinkling lights of Seoul as tears continued to trickle down his cheeks. He wondered whether Jinwoo had gotten home safely. There was no way for him to know; he would rather dig his own grave then text Jinwoo right now. 

He dragged himself to bed, barely awake, and dreamed of a summer where his nose inhaled the scent of Jinwoo’s special shampoo and his hands were filled with his.

The entirety of April was exam month. This meant Dongmin had something to do the entire time and not think about his straight boy crush who had rejected him. He stopped eating with the others and didn’t go around campus all that much. He decided he needed time for himself, time to heal himself. 

Jinwoo barely saw Dongmin around and he stopped coming to lunch.  _ He’s probably not eating enough.  _ The couple of times he saw Dongmin was in the drama department and in the library. He didn’t look  _ terrible _ (which, this was Dongmin, how could he ever look terrible) but it was very easy to see that he was upset. Uneasy. A restless aura had replaced his comfortable one. 

Dongmin started skipping lunch at school hours and instead ate a mixture of dinner and lunch at home now. He never needed to stay on campus for long enough to get truly hungry, so it didn’t matter all that much to him. He solely focused on his university work and even squeezed a couple of simple photoshoots into his schedule. He was doing just fine.

The two times he saw Jinwoo was when he was waiting for Myungjun once and when he was in the library. Both of those times he seemed to not notice Dongmin, especially in the library. Dongmin took the liberty to look at him once again. 

Not much had changed about him, though he started wearing only t-shirts as the weather warmed up. He seemed healthy, though he did seem to be down about something. It was apparent in the small pout he couldn’t hide.  _ Probably something that has to do with his schoolwork.  _ It was exam season, after all.

And so the month of April passed by pretty quickly. When Dongmin exited his last performative exam and got up into his apartment, he decided to ring Mingyu. 

“Hi, old friend.”

“Oh, long time no see Dongmin-ssi. How is our Prince doing?”

Dongmin chuckled. 

“I’m fine. You?”

“Absolutely dandy. Finished my last exam today- it wasn’t fun.”

Dongmin bit his lip and played with the small piece of skin separating from his thumb with his fingernail.

“I’m done with mine, too. Say, what if we went clubbing this weekend? Itaewon, hm?”

“That is unusual for you Dongmin. You’re not one to like clubbing. Oh wait- do you wanna get laid-”

“Yes, Mingyu. Are you down?”

“Ohoho. For sure. We’ll go to  _ Spark _ this Saturday, hm?”

“Sure, I’ll be there at 11.”

Dongmin hung up with a big breath. He needed comfort and touch, and he didn’t mind if they came from a stranger at this point.

Saturday rolled around and Dongmin stood in front of the brightly colored building. It’s neon sign, lettering  _ Spark  _ with rainbow colors made it seem very obvious that this was, indeed, a gay bar. He was wearing black jeans and a white shirt under a blazer with chain details. He knew he looked good, he had spent a good thirty minutes on lifting and styling his hair.

“Yah! Dongmin-ah!” Mingyu shuffled over to him. “Long time no see.” They hugged.

“Let’s go in then.”

Dongmin’s eyes had to adjust to the lights when they entered. There were strobe lights shining on the dance floor, filled with people dancing with no space in between. 

“Hey, you go sit at the bar, I have to check on a friend real quick.” Mingyu smiled and waved at him, leaving him to climb the stairs of the club to the upstairs bar area. 

The bar was illuminated by yellow lights and it was much quieter than the dance area. There were two guys in one corner, leaned over to each other's face, talking with hushed breaths. Dongmin sat further away from them and ordered himself a gin and tonic. He had guessed Mingyu would ditch him but he didn’t think it’d be this early.

He stared at his glass and took a couple sips, the high alcohol content burning his throat. It had been some time. He tried his best not to think about-  _ him _ , but it was quite hard and the alcohol was already affecting him. The image of Jinwoo sitting in a cafe waiting for him, with a white sweatshirt and ripped jeans, his hands between his legs, biting his lip flashed in his mind. He sighed. He thought getting over a crush would be easier than this. It had already been a month, he had to stop thinking about Jinwoo’s beauty marks and his kind smiles and his soft hair-

“You seem to be deep in thought,” a deep voice interrupted Dongmin’s train of thought. He looked up to meet the eyes of a built and tall man, probably in his twenties, wearing a leather jacket and a smirk on his face. 

_ This is going to be easier than I thought. _

“Yeah, stuff has been happening.”

“Mind if I sit here?” The man motioned to the bar stool next to Dongmin. 

“Not if you buy me drinks,” Dongmin responded, shooting a charming smile. 

The man took a seat, ordered himself whiskey and Dongmin another gin and tonic. Dongmin wondered whether he was trying to look like a bad boy stereotype or whether he was usually like this. His aura seemed to suggest the second choice.

“Coming to a gay bar to drink seems weird,” the man mused.

“I didn’t come to drink,” Dongmin replied, taking a swig. The man extended his hand.

“I’m Hyonjung.”

“Eunwoo. Nice to meet you.”

He had used that fake name a couple of times before, in similar situations. They shook hands.

“I actually came with my friend, but he ditched me downstairs,” Dongmin defended himself.

“I’m in a similar situation, you could say. Sort of third wheeled here and now they’re probably making out on the dance floor.” Dongmin laughed with the man.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you here before, though. Not to say I’m a regular here but I do visit now and then.” The man sipped his drink.

“I haven’t been here in two years.”

“Must be a special occasion then.”

“You could say so.”  _ Getting rejected drags you places.  _ “My exams are over.”

“You’re a university student, then. What are you studying?”

Dongmin found no excuse to lie. “Drama.”

“You’re going to be an actor, then? It would suit you.”

Dongmin arched his eyebrow. “We’ll see. I’m not sure.”

“That’s fine. I first went to university for engineering and now I’m a lawyer. Shit changes.” Dongmin shot him a puzzled look.

“Changed majors in second year. Packed in a lot of classes in a short period and graduated in time. I got my lawyer’s license just this year, though.”

Dongmin nodded approvingly. The booming of the music still reached this area, though it was more of a lull than anything. The man shifted in his seat and adjusted his jacket.

“Do you work out?”

“Hm? Yeah. It started as a stress-relief thing, but I just enjoy it now. Though I don’t do anything extra- powders and stuff. Really not my thing.”

_ Jinwoo didn’t like exercising in the gym. We were supposed to go out to play soccer. _

“I go sometimes too but I prefer to watch what I eat rather than exercise.”

They continued to talk as the booming music from downstairs changed. The couple at the other end of the bar had left, giggling into each other's breaths. A lot more people had climbed up, seemingly exhausted from dancing or the loud music. Or both. Dongmin downed his drink and Hyonjung motioned for the bartender to give another one. Dongmin already felt woozy. 

“You’re going quick.” 

Dongmin stared at the man from under his lashes. The alcohol had suddenly hit him. 

“I feel like I have to drink a lot tonight.”

“Wouldn’t be great if you passed out.”

Dongmin shook his head. His eyesight was slipping and his arms felt heavy.  _ How did it affect me so quickly? _

“I won’t pass out. I can handle my drinks.”

Hyonjung laughed at him.

“Maybe shooting back four glasses of gin and tonic wasn’t the wisest decision.”

“Maybe buying all of them wasn’t the wisest decision _. _ ”

Hyonjung laughed.

“I don’t mind paying for your drinks.”

Dongmin turned his body to face the man.

“Why?”

“I feel like it might lead to an interesting night.”

Dongmin fully checked out the man in front of him. Light brown hair swept back, high cheekbones and daring eyes, leather jacket fitting comfortably on his big form, chelsea boots on the bar stool’s footrest; he looked good. Definitely good.

Dongmin leaned into his ear. “Buy me another one we’ll see where it goes.”

Hyonjung ordered another one. 

They chatted more as Dongmin drank more. He noticed the man had cut back on his own drinking, probably to adjust to how drunk Dongmin was getting. He laughed at the jokes the man made and thought it was easy for him to carry a conversation with him. 

At some point, Dongmin softly touched the man’s elbow, then rested his hand on his thigh. He knew he still looked composed, his charming smile fixated on his face. After finishing his, god knows which drink, he leaned into the man’s lips.

“Let’s go to a love hotel.”

The man leaned in too and their lips brushed.

“You’re pretty drunk. You sure?”

Dongmin looked at him. The man’s eyes resembled a cat.

“I came here with that intention. Let’s go.”

They finally kissed. 

It was hot and heavy, though a bit awkward because of the distance between their heavy barstools. Dongmin dragged his hand to the man’s upper thigh.

“There’s one I know that’s quite close,” the man mumbled when they seperated. He pulled away and gave the bartender his credit card. Dongmin almost lost his balance so he held onto the man’s strong arms. They got up and scurried out quickly.

The cold air of the night hit Dongmin’s face and he had to blink to adjust his eyes. It felt refreshing after hours in that bar. He stumbled just a little and the man stabled him with a hand on his back. He pointed them towards up the street where the bar was. Dongmin took a big breath.

“Ah, that feels refreshing.” He crossed his arms together and stretched his neck. The man offered him a kind smile. They continued walking. Dongmin stumbled sometimes- okay, maybe a lot of times and the man had to keep him from falling every time. Dongmin chuckled each time.

When they were nearing the bright red lights of the love hotel, Dongmin stumbled once more. This time the man had to grab him by his waist and pull him close. Their faces were inches apart. Somehow, in this corner of Itaewon, on a Saturday night, the two were alone, so Dongmin pulled the man close and kissed him. The man was a couple centimeters taller than him, so Dongmin could rest his head on the crook of his neck when they pulled apart. He smiled. The man was still holding him close. Dongmin figured he liked being held safe in big arms.

_ Yeah, you don’t need Jinwoo. He doesn’t have buff arms anyways. _

Dongmin chuckled and snuggled into the other and the man laughed with him.

“Guess you’re a clingy drunk, huh?” A smile was still fixated on his face.

Dongmin nodded and separated from the man, holding his hand and walking towards the hotel.

When they entered, the man paid for their room to an older lady behind a glass screen. They didn’t get weird looks from her, which Dongmin was glad for. This hotel was close to a lot of gay bars, so gay couples must have been a regular occurence.

The man guided Dongmin to the elevator with a hand on his back again. It didn’t feel intrusive, it was more hovering on his back then anything else. Dongmin was lucky he was so understanding. He didn’t know if he would put up with someone as drunk as him.

They stumbled into their room and the moment he closed the door, Dongmin had latched onto his lips. His hands were on his pecs, traveling to his back under his leather jacket.

“Hey, hey. I think- maybe you should shower. You’re really drunk right now.” Dongmin started kissing him once again. 

“Don’t wanna shower.” He made a move towards his lips but was stopped by the man grabbing his wrists and forcing them away.

“You should. Just get under the water. I want you to sober up at least a little bit.”

The man guided him to the bathroom and started the shower and turned the temperature to cold.

“I’ll be outside. Come back in whenever you’re ready.” He left the bathroom. 

Left with no choice, Dongmin shed his clothes and climbed into the cubicle. The cold water pricked at his skin and he shivered.

He stood under the water for five or ten minutes, drunkenly staring at the showerhead. His eyes were very red and his lips looked chapped. He didn’t want to use the generic shampoo there and opted to wash his body with the bodywash and his hands. It was weird to touch his own body while his head felt like it was floating, though the cold water was helping him sober up. When he exited and grabbed a bathrobe, he was nearly sober; he had stopped stumbling and his head didn’t feel like it was swimming in water. He grabbed a towel and dried his hair, as much as he could. He took a big breath and walked outside.

The man- no,  _ Hyonjung _ , was lying on the bed, only in his boxers, scrolling through his phone. When he saw him, he straightened on the bed. 

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“How are you feeling?”

“Awake, more or less.”

“Good.” He put his phone on the nightstand. “Do you still want to do this?”

Dongmin took a big breath. “Yes.”

He climbed up to the bed and leaned over to the other. He was a little embarrassed now, the other had seen him in a state he didn’t show to a lot of people. He felt redness rise to his cheeks. They kissed and the man put his hand on his back, though this time a bit lower than he usually did. He flipped Dongmin over and brushed his hair away as they continued to kiss. When they seperated, to catch their breaths and to ease some nerves, Dongmin giggled. Hyonjung smirked and trailed his hand from Dongmin’s knee to his upper thigh. 

  
  


Dongmin woke up with his back slightly aching. He rubbed sleep out from his eyes. His stomach ached: that was his hangover. He felt so hungry. He lifted his body up on the bed and stared at the window on the left side of the room. He rubbed his eyes once again. Instinctively wanting to check the time, he searched for his phone. He saw his black clutch bag thrown on the floor. He sighed and looked to his left, where the other man was sleeping. His back was broad and muscular and his skin, hit by sunlight, looked warm. Dongmin got up as quietly as he could. 

It was nearing 11 AM. He checked some notifications- two from Mingyu saying;

**Mingyu:** saw u leave the bar

**Mingyu:** text me whether ur safe

He decided to reply, grateful his friend didn’t make any jokes about his one-night stand.

**Dongmin:** yea im fine

**Dongmin:** did u get home safe

He put his phone back into his bag. He collected his clothes from the bathroom floor. Though his t-shirt was a bit wrinkled, without the jacket he didn’t look like he was wearing clothes from last night. He messed with his hair a bit in the mirror after dressing up, trying to straighten some curled parts on his sides. He eventually gave up.

He grabbed his bag and checked its contents. Nothing seemed to be missing. He looked over one last time to the man sleeping on the bed and headed for the door. The moment he opened it, a voice called for him. 

“Eunwoo-ssi?”

Dongmin closed the door again and headed back.

“Hi. I didn’t mean to wake you. Thank you for last night, I’ll be going now. Take care.”

The man rubbed his eyes.

“Wait! Uh,” he grabbed his phone from the nightstand. “Can you give me your number?”

Dongmin looked at the phone extended towards him, then back at the man. Memories of the man on his back, their breaths mingling as they moved in sync flashed in his mind.

“I’m sorry, Hyonjung-ssi. Really though, thank you for last night. Goodbye.”

He left without another word.

He took the bus home, his empty stomach growling and aching. He figured he’d buy some pastries from the cafe close to his apartment. He texted Mingyu during his ride who eventually joked about him having a one night stand.

He wondered why he had rejected Hyonjung. He was a charming man, who had treated him nicely. He decided to not think too much about it, he would give his heart time to figure itself out. He didn’t need to jump on the first man he had sex with after a rejection. 

Classes weren’t any easier, even though the exams were done. There was quite a lot of written work Dongmin was given but he could take in more job offers during May. It felt renewing, the ending of spring. He even went to the music rooms to practice his piano sometimes. He had missed playing it. Even though it was something his mother had forced him to do when he was little, he grew quite fond of playing the instrument. He wouldn’t feel time flow when he played songs he had practiced a hundred times with his old piano teacher. 

May was a rejuvenating time for Dongmin. He decided to indulge in the memories of Jinwoo and the memories of his fantasies with Jinwoo. No matter how much it stung to know they wouldn’t be real, living in them one last time felt ameliorating to him. 

For some reason, the memory that kept flashing in his mind was the smile Jinwoo had gifted him when he had let Dongmin listen to his work for the first time. Dongmin could have listened from his Soundcloud, but he opted to wait until Jinwoo had felt comfortable enough to share his projects with him. It was an orchestra piece with Myungjun’s vocals and Jinwoo’s rapping. It was really good in Dongmin’s opinion and he liked that Jinwoo hadn’t gone the obvious rap over trap music route- though he found out later that he did that too. He didn’t mind the music when it was mixed with Jinwoo’s growling voice, he found. The image of the Jinwoo who lived in those songs was much different to the Jinwoo sitting next to him, a mixed pattern plaid jacket on, a small hoop earring shining in the sunlight, his bangs that were pushed to the sides of his head because they were too long, his eyes nearly closed because of his smile: his big, warm, inviting smile. Dongmin cherished the memory, like he was dusting old trophies in his heart.

  
  


The way Dongmin had suddenly stopped coming to their almost-daily lunches had shocked everyone and they kept asking Jinwoo about it. He decided to keep quiet and say he didn’t know, though everyone could read from his face that he knew. Myungjun had taken on the role of distracting everyone whenever that happened. 

Jinwoo felt shitty. He really did. He didn’t know he was attached to Dongmin as much as he was. He missed the boy, whenever he waited for his Wednesday class, whenever he passed by the library or saw the carp-shaped bread ice cream he liked to eat. He missed his kind smiles and the way he would straighten up and look at him with all his attention whenever he told him a story. He saw him on campus, though very rarely. Each time he searched him for something- he didn’t quite know what it was. There wasn’t any chance of him asking Jinwoo again, not when Jinwoo had told him he was straight. He kept thinking back to Dongmin’s red eyes from that night. Jinwoo didn’t think he deserved Dongmin’s tears due to his rejection. They should’ve never been in a position where Jinwoo could reject Dongmin. He sighed. 

They were at a cafe with Myungjun once again, though this one was far from campus. They had come here because Myungjun had heard that their smoothies were good. They were actually pretty good and the overt sweetness coated Jinwoo’s tongue. He couldn’t help but overhear the conversation of two guys from the table behind them.

“He was so pretty. He just got up and left in the morning though. Wish you guys had seen him- he was out of this world. I’m pretty sure I saw his face in advertisements before. He just went ‘Sorry, I can’t. Thank you for last night,’ and left. I mean, I was sure we had some chemistry between us. God, maybe I shouldn’t have asked for his number-”

“Dude. Stop sulking about your one-night stand. Please. He clearly just saw it as a one off thing. You have no way of contacting him anyways, best to forget about it, hm?”

Jinwoo hadn’t even been courteous enough to thank Dongmin for the night he treated him, to  _ samgyeopsal _ too. That wasn’t how he usually was, though he had figured he would have treated him to something else after that night.

He pouted and shook his nearly empty plastic cup. 

“Yah. What’s with the pout? You thinking about Dongmin again?”

Jinwoo looked at him with pleading eyes.

“Again?! It’s been a month, Jinwoo-yah. Anyone else would think  _ he  _ was the one who rejected you.”

“I miss him, hyung. And… seeing him get over it, slowly… I mean it’s good for him… that was what I had hoped for…”

Jinwoo stared out into the bustling street in front of them from the big windows of the shop. 

“God, heartbroken Jinwoo is the worst. Why don’t you go and, oh I don’t know, actually communicate with him? Be honest with him?”

Jinwoo looked at Myungjun, eyes wide. 

“I can’t… maybe I could have some time ago. But it’s been too long now.” He sighed, slurping the last of his smoothie. Maybe the overtly sweet drink would coat his emotions too. It reminded him of the time Dongmin had bought him strawberry ice cream after his showcase of his biggest project this year to his production professor. 

“Okay, that’s it, I have a plan. We’re going drinking,  _ all _ of us. I’m going to convince Dongmin. Maybe you can talk it out and stop sulking about it.”

“Good luck. Who’d be willing to agree to sit with their straight crush after he rejected him-”

“Shut it. You know my superpowers, I’ll do it.”

Myungjun was already texting their group chat.

  
  


“Yah! Dongmin-ah!” Dongmin turned to Myungjun’s voice calling for him.

“Long time no see.” 

Dongmin smiled. “Yeah, hyung.”

“We’re going to go drinking this weekend- all six of us. And you’re coming. Great talk.”

Myungjun turned around and started walking away.

“Wait- hyung. I can’t, I have a lot of assignments to finish.”

“That seems like a you problem. If it’s too much, pester me about helping you out later. We’re going out and that’s final. Be at  _ Youth-  _ was it  _ Youth?- _ yeah,  _ Youth Pub _ at 9 PM this Saturday. Bye, Dongmin-ah!”

Myungjun ran back over to his friend group from his major.

Dongmin thought about it a lot. He still clearly wasn’t over Jinwoo. Though, his one-night stand had helped; he had reminded himself that he could still be open to new opportunities and new people in his life. Jinwoo had been exceptional to him- everything about him. He thought Jinwoo didn’t seem exceptional, not at first, unless you got close to him. The moment he pulled you in though, you were a moth and he was candlelight. His  _ warmth _ , inside and out, his sincerity, the way love shined in his eyes, radiated off him, that made you feel calm and happy, it was something Dongmin had never experienced before.

Saturday creeped up on him and he decided to let his heart judge whether he would go that night. He tried not to rack his brain over too much. He opted to focus on his schoolwork, piano and spending more time with Mingyu and Seokmin. They were meeting up in the evenings because they were in different universities. They had teased him a lot for calling them only to go and have a one-night stand and made fun of him a lot more when he told them the reason why he felt he needed to have one. He saw that he could laugh about the topic now, though it still hurt just a bit, it wasn’t an unbearable feeling. He hoped every laugh he let out would ease his pain a little. 

On Saturday, at 6 PM, Dongmin was sitting in his small balcony, in his pajamas, staring at the sunset. More and more buildings started twinkling with their own lights as the sun went down. He felt the orange and pink hues of the dusk wash over him and the small wind ruffling the arms of his t-shirt cleared his head.

He would go, he decided. He didn’t know if it would help him in the long run, but he decided to go anyway. Perhaps because he had missed his friend group and their playful banter, perhaps because he wanted to make sure Jinwoo was healthy or perhaps, just because he felt like going out that day. 

He arrived at the bar a little late, not wanting to seem too eager and wait for the others as he was sure they’d be late too. He went inside to see Bin, Minhyuk and Sanha were already there. He saw Bin and Minhyuk hold hands from under the table.

“Hi, everyone.”

He seated himself next to Bin and Minhyuk, towards the end of the U shaped table. 

“Dongmin-ah! We missed you!” Bin exclaimed, hugging him with one arm. Dongmin smiled. 

“I missed you guys too.”

“Why did you suddenly stop meeting us? That was weird,” Minhyuk chimed in, looking at the menu in his hand.

“I was busy, exams and all,” Dongmin lied and picked up a menu himself.

“Uh huh, sure. That certainly explains why Jinwoo-hyung has been sulking when we ask him about you. Or even when we’re not asking about you. He keeps sulking-”

“Hey guys!” Myungjun’s voice chimed from the entrance to the bar. Jinwoo was trailing him.

“Hi, everyone,” Myungjun exclaimed once again, when they neared the table. Sanha was getting ready to move up into the U shape of the table when Myungjun stopped him by holding his shoulders.

“Get up, Sanha.”

“Hyung, why-”

Myungjun lifted him from his shoulders, and pushed Jinwoo inside, then shuffled himself in. Jinwoo’s shoulder brushed against Dongmin when Sanha finally sat down at his old seat.

_ Goddamnit. _

He should’ve predicted Myungjun would do something like this. 

“Hey, why are you staring at your menus? We agreed we’d drink soju.”

Myungjun called on a waiter. “Six bottles of soju please.”

Myungjun eased everyone into conversation once again and Bin and Minhyuk kept shooting each other glances and smiling. Sanha noticed him staring.

“Oh, yeah. Those two are dating now.”

Minhyuk looked at Sanha with haste. “Hey! We haven’t made anything official yet.”

Bin laughed from next to him. 

“Sure, sucking faces is the most unofficial thing ever-”

Minhyuk leaned over and flicked him on the forehead.

“Ow! I didn’t deserve that! You two are literally holding hands under the table!”

“So what, huh? Mind your own business.”

Minhyuk sat back down, connecting his hand to Bin’s again. Bin stared at him with an amused smile.

Dongmin noticed that Jinwoo had curled into himself, his hands locked into each other between his thighs, his shoulders slightly hunched over. Dongmin moved a little bit to Bin’s side. Jinwoo looked at him from the corner of his eye.  _ Puppy. _

The waiter brought them shot glasses and bottles of soju. Myungjun poured his shot excitedly.

“Okay, we have to do cheers.” Myungjun hovered his glass in the middle of the table. Everyone followed suit. 

“Cheers!”

Dongmin felt the alcohol burn his throat. He had been feeling that too often lately.  _ I should cut back after tonight. _

He noticed Jinwoo was going quick in his drinking, already halfway through his bottle when they had been sitting for twenty minutes. Dongmin decided silence between them wouldn’t help anything.

“You should go slow. You told me you don’t like being drunk.”

Jinwoo was shocked to hear Dongmin’s voice directed at himself. He looked at the other man and his serious expression then swallowed around nothing. He looked back at his glass and drank another shot.

“I want to drink tonight.”  _ Need to. _

Dongmin blinked and turned at the commotion going on between Myungjun and Bin.

The night continued on, loud. There was someone screaming about something every other minute. He had missed them. He really had. He didn’t quite notice the empty bottles fill the table, then be cleared by the waiters, but he certainly noticed Myungjun and Jinwoo getting drunker by the second. He had decided to not go past his initial one bottle, he didn’t want to be drunk tonight. Unlike, apparently, the man on his right.

After his first bottle, Jinwoo was having a hard time holding in his giggles and holding his head up. He kept laughing at anything Myungjun said, even if it was him announcing he was going to go pee. He kept leaning over the table and clutching his bottle. After Myungjun left to pee, Jinwoo suddenly put a hand on Dongmin’s knee. 

“Dongmin-ah.”

Dongmin stared at him with wide eyes.

“Hm?”

Jinwoo locked eyes with him, eyes going back and forth Dongmin’s pupils. 

He then leaned over and poured himself another shot and didn’t say anything.

Bin and Minhyuk had gotten cuddlier as the night went on but they also hadn’t drank as much as Myungjun and Jinwoo- or, well, weren’t as drunk as those two. One bottle really was enough to get them blackout drunk. 

“Ugh,” he heard Jinwoo exhale. “It’s too hot.” 

He leaned over the table and lifted his shirt, waving the end towards his face. Dongmin couldn’t hide his shocked expression but decided to look the other way. He had seen that Jinwoo’s nipples were perked up. It was enough to make him blush.

When Myungjun came back, he saw Jinwoo, pointed at him and started laughing. He almost toppled over onto the floor, though thankfully Sanha guided him to his seat.

“Yah! What are you- what are you doing?” He clapped his hands and continued laughing. “You should be showing your tits to the guy next to you, not the floor.” He wheezed in between his words.

Jinwoo had let go of his shirt. He hit Myungjun on the arm.

“Stop teasing me!”

Dongmin knew that he was blushing.

Even though one bottle had been enough to get the duo thoroughly drunk, they kept ordering, in spite of the others’ protests. By the end of their second bottles, they weren’t staying upright. Myungjun was mumbling about something and giggling into Sanha’s shoulder and Jinwoo was nearly sitting on the floor, falling off his seat, his knees bent. He suddenly got up.

“I’m! Gonna go pee.”

He stumbled, jumping across his seat and toppled onto the floor. People from the table next to them turned to look. Dongmin immediately got up and helped him up, holding him by his shoulders. 

“Okay, okay. I’ll take you to the toilet.” 

Dongmin walked Jinwoo to the bathrooms, holding him upright by the sides of his arms. He shoved Jinwoo into the men’s room.

“Go. I’ll wait outside.”

He heard Jinwoo pee and then wash his hands, pacing outside the door. He would need a little more to drink if he was going to have to deal with this.

Jinwoo pulled the bathroom door open and threw himself onto Dongmin, his hands locked together on his back. “Dongminie,” he drawled. 

“Dongminie... I hurt you, didn’t I? I’m sorry. Hyung is so sorry, Minnie.” 

Dongmin didn’t know where to put his hands, nor knew what to do with a drunk Jinwoo hugging him, on the verge of tears.

“I shouldn’t have! I’m so sorry. Why did you even like me-”

“Hyung-”

“I mean I don’t get it.” Jinwoo snuggled more into Dongmin’s chest. “I really shouldn't've- I shouldn’t’ve lied-”

“Hyung, your pants are still unzipped.”

Jinwoo looked up at him from his chest. Dongmin wouldn’t have guessed this would be the first time he would see Jinwoo look up at him from his chest, nor that it would be with drunk, unfocused eyes.

“Oh.”

Jinwoo pulled away from Dongmin and threw his back onto the wall. He shuffled his pants up, zipped it and then carefully buckled his belt. When he was done, Dongmin took him by his arm and started guiding him to their table, though Jinwoo started hugging him once again.

“Hyung is so sorry. I’m so sorry. Sorry I made you sad. I’m sorry.”

When they got back to the table, Myungjun was sprawled over Sanha and Bin was nudging him, his face twisted in a concerned look.

“Hey, Dongmin-ah,” Minhyuk talked over Jinwoo and Myungjun’s mumblings. “We’re going to take Myungjun back, you can handle Jinwoo, right? Sanha’s a bit drunk too, so.”

The couple scurried out of their seats and grabbed the other two. 

“We already paid for everything, so don’t worry. Mostly from Myungjun’s wallet because he was the one who proposed this and then proceeded to get drunk. Bye!”

They shuffled them out of their seats, Myungjun in a much worse state than Sanha. They exited the bar in a haste, leaving Dongmin and a clingy Jinwoo.

Dongmin decided he would finish his second bottle. 

“I’m so bad! I’m so bad!” Jinwoo decided to get on his fours on the rails where he was sitting but Dongmin forced him to sit down. Jinwoo wobbled in his seat, then stared at Dongmin’s hands on his arms, stabling him. He looked up at the man, who was looking at him with concern in his eyes. His black hair was a bit tousled but he still looked like a doll under the dim lights of the bar.

“You’re still taking care of me even though I broke your heart.” Jinwoo teared up and a couple dropped from his cheeks, twinkling in the yellow lights of the bar.

“Hey, now. Don’t cry,” Dongmin picked up tissues and wiped the other’s face. At the touch, Jinwoo looked up at Dongmin, who was closer to him to be able to see his face. His fingers were trailing his cheek with the softest touches. He was done with crying after two seconds and started staring at Dongmin’s eyes. He leaned his hand over and brushed Dongmin’s cheek with his thumb.

“You’re so pretty. From up close you’re prettier.”

Dongmin blushed and stopped wiping Jinwoo’s face. He looked down. He liked the compliment when it came from Jinwoo, although he knew it was simply platonic. He stared at the wet tissue in his hands. Jinwoo was sniffling a little.

Jinwoo suddenly stood up from his seat (that seemed to be his thing when he got drunk) and leaned over Dongmin who was seated. 

“Do you have any idea what you do to me?”

Jinwoo sat down on Dongmin’s right leg. He held the other’s face between his hands.

“Do you have any idea how much I missed you?”

Dongmin gulped. He was grateful he had decided to finish his second bottle, he wouldn’t have been able to handle this if he wasn’t just at the beginnings of being tipsy.

Jinwoo buried his face into the crook of Dongmin’s neck, his hot breath hitting his skin. Jinwoo bent his right knee and pressed it onto Dongmin’s crotch. He rocked in his seat, his bulge moving on Dongmin’s thigh. He inhaled a big breath of Dongmin’s scent. “Fuck,” he whispered into his ear. He bit on his earlobe. “Let’s go to my house.”

Dongmin did not know how to handle this. He had never expected anything remotely close to what was happening right now and he was, by all accounts, very confused.

“Hyung- you- I-” 

He had to take a deep breath. It was filled with the scent of alcohol, Jinwoo’s laundry detergent and his special shampoo.

“You told me you were straight.”

“I lied.”

Jinwoo rocked his hips in Dongmin’s lap again.

“You- you lied? Why?” Dongmin asked, flabbergasted.

Jinwoo opted to stay silent. He inhaled Dongmin’s scent once again, the warmth of his body on his cheek. He pushed his knee against Dongmin’s crotch again. Dongmin inhaled a sharp breath, the contact unexpected. 

“Let’s go home. Please?” Jinwoo stared at him with puppy eyes. Dongmin knew he wouldn’t get his answer tonight, not when drunk Jinwoo said and did as he pleased. He sighed. He didn’t know if hedonism fit Jinwoo.

“Okay.”

He had to take Jinwoo home, after all, no matter what Jinwoo’s intentions were. He lifted the other up and got up himself, getting out of the rail seat. Jinwoo was very drowsy and kept knocking into the furniture around them. His hair was really messy and he  _ looked  _ very drunk. He helped Jinwoo get out too. He kept staring at the man clinging on him, who had just told him that he wasn’t straight and that he had lied- Dongmin could not conjure up any reason why. If he had said it so that he didn’t have to reject Dongmin on the grounds of not liking him romantically, why was he so clingy, muttering praises and adament on sex now, when his inhibitions were lowered? He grabbed their bags, called an uber and got them outside. 

The fresh air hit Dongmin and Jinwoo’s face, who was clinging on to his side. Jinwoo buried himself further into Dongmin’s warm body. He wrapped his hands around the taller, wanting to touch skin instead of cloth. He pushed hands up onto Dongmin’s body from under his t-shirt. Dongmin jumped at the motion but didn’t push his hands away.

“You smell really nice. I’m going to ride you tonight.”

Dongmin looked at Jinwoo, his mouth hanging open. Jinwoo leaned over and left a peck on his hanging lower lip. “Cute.” He smiled, eyes shaping into crescents and buried his head into Dongmin’s chest again.

Dongmin felt his soul leave his body and stare at them from above, his mind replaying the moment Jinwoo kissed him over and over again. He kept staring at Jinwoo, nothing but shock on his face. Jinwoo decided to hang onto the other with his entire body weight and bury his nose into his chest. Dongmin caught himself from falling last minute.

He had so many questions. He knew it was futile searching for answers from drunk Jinwoo, who was small and curled into him, with his crotch shifting on Dongmin’s thigh. Dongmin gulped once again. 

Their uber arrived a bit later and Dongmin had to push Jinwoo in before he could get in because Jinwoo wouldn’t leave his side. He told the address to Jinwoo’s apartment and closed the door.

The car ride wasn’t long and Jinwoo continued to drape himself over Dongmin, who had one hand wrapped around the smaller’s shoulders. He kept mumbling something, Dongmin could only hear “tonight… good… sorry…” from where Jinwoo had completely shoved his face into his chest. He also had his right leg swung over Dongmin’s, moving his hips constantly. Dongmin wished the ride would be over quicker. He didn’t want to have sex with Jinwoo, who was clearly very drunk and god knows whether he would do these things if he wasn’t drunk, who was small and clingy. His slight drunkenness was quick to retaliate that he  _ should _ do it, simply because he wanted to. He wanted to  _ so badly. _ He was getting all the skinship he dreamt of for months in one night.

The car pulled over and Dongmin had to shuffle quite a bit to get Jinwoo out. He wouldn’t let go of his t-shirt, his fist curled over it in an iron grip. He carried him up and to the elevators with more ease as Jinwoo didn’t want to let go of him, ever. In the elevator, Jinwoo started kissing his chest, up to his collarbones where he could reach. Dongmin wanted to stop him, but his mind was paralyzed. When they got up to his apartment, he punched in Jinwoo’s pincode to the padlock. Jinwoo had told him what it was months ago, when he decided Dongmin could come in whenever he wanted. It had felt like a big step for Dongmin.

Shuffling the boy and himself inside, Dongmin barely found time to put his bag down on the coathanger in the entryway before Jinwoo pushed him back against the wall and kissed him. It was sloppy and Jinwoo was bringing his face down by pulling him in by the neck of his t-shirt. His hand was traveling down his chest and made it to his belt when Dongmin stopped him.

“Hyung. You’re drunk. We’re not having sex.”

Jinwoo stared at him, still on his tiptoes, barely out of his shoes, with angry eyes- as angry as drunk Jinwoo could get. 

“No... I’m going to ride you tonight. I told you.”

He moved to kiss Dongmin again, this time his hands on his neck, forcing him down.

Dongmin still felt like it was an alternative version of him experiencing this, or that this was a hallucination. Being tipsy didn’t help his delusions. There Jinwoo was; excited and needy, inviting Dongmin in with all his warmth but Dongmin felt separated, from the version of him actually touching the warm body to the version of him that was seeing and comprehending what was happening.

Jinwoo took him by his arm and dragged him to his bedroom, kissing him on the entryway. He trailed his lips down to his neck, hands shuffling with the buckle of his belt.

“Shower,” Dongmin wheezed out. “You have to go shower. Under cold water. You need to sober up. We’re not doing this when you’re so drunk.”

Jinwoo looked up at him. “Don’t wanna.” 

He almost went back to kissing Dongmin’s neck but Dongmin forced him away. The lust-filled side of his brain didn’t like that.

“No, you have to.”

Dongmin dragged the drunk boy to the adjacent bathroom and turned on the shower, to a cold but manageable temperature. Still not something ideal for a shower but definitely what Jinwoo needed right now.

“Go in. I’ll be outside. I’ll make you coffee.”

Dongmin got out of the bathroom, closed the door then leaned on it with a heavy breath.

_ What the fuck is happening? _

He made his way to the kitchen once he heard Jinwoo close the shower curtains. He started making coffee from Jinwoo’s small coffee machine, the way the other liked; one shot of espresso with warm milk, though he made sure there was much more coffee than milk in the cup. 

He kept having to stop himself from thinking about Jinwoo’s lips and his insistence on  _ riding him _ tonight. He had thought the man was straight until an hour ago. He felt separated from his reality, as if these things weren’t happening to him and that he would somehow find himself home.

He went back into the bedroom once the coffee was done and set it on the nightstand.

Jinwoo had absentmindedly obeyed Dongmin’s orders once he was left alone. He stood under the cold water, clutching his arms together. He was waking up, just a little. He decided to not wash his body- there was a Dongmin outside who he had to ride tonight, waiting after all. He couldn’t think much, all he felt was the experience of being woozy and the expectation of sex. He brushed his teeth, in the shower after smelling his own breath. He was out in less than five minutes. He wore a bathrobe and padded out of the bathroom, head slightly cleared. He didn’t feel like his vision was swimming now, though his limbs still felt like they were moving on their own accord. He wasn’t sober, not in the very least, but his head was somewhat cleared and he had one objective: to fuck Dongmin. To fuck him so hard he would forget his name.

Dongmin was sitting on his bed, visibly unsure as to what to do when Jinwoo got out. He sprang up from his seat the moment he saw him. 

“Hyung, uh, how are you feeling-”

“Shut up.” 

Jinwoo pushed him to the wall, again, and kissed him hard. His minty breath mingled with Dongmin’s who still smelled like soju. Jinwoo found he didn’t mind. Dongmin reciprocated this time, his hand going to his back. Jinwoo almost giggled with glee.

“Are you- are you sure about this? I don’t want to fuck you when you’re drunk, hyung.”

Jinwoo wrapped a hand around Dongmin’s back. 

“I’ve never been so sure. And I don’t think my stupid brain will let me do this if I’m not a bit drunk.” Jinwoo stood on his tiptoes and pressed a kiss against Dongmin’s lips. They locked eyes and Jinwoo saw Dongmin’s resolve give up. He carefully placed his hands on the back of Jinwoo’s neck and kissed him; sweet, only a bit rushed, with just a taste of the lust he was hiding. Jinwoo felt his heart fill with adoration. He trailed his hands under Dongmin’s navy blue t-shirt. He pushed it up to his chest and Dongmin separated to pull it off. Jinwoo kissed his neck, then his collarbone, then the top of his chest, promptly dropping to his knees.

He unbuckled Dongmin’s belt hastily, palming his growing hard-on from his briefs. Dongmin felt his consciousness leave his form again, as if he was looking at Jinwoo on his knees with needy eyes from the ceiling. The lazy knot Jinwoo had tied his bathrobe with was quickly coming undone and it forced the bathrobe to fall slightly down his shoulders. Dongmin could see his pecs and the ends of his tattoo from the cleavage it had created. He took a deep breath.

Jinwoo mouthed around the other’s dick through the fabric. He traced the tent in the briefs, looking up to see Dongmin’s reactions. Each time they locked eyes Dongmin felt like he was being electrocuted. He threaded his hand through Jinwoo’s wet, ruffled hair. 

“Fuck,” was all he could mumble when Jinwoo pulled his cock out and started jerking him off. Jinwoo eyed his dick and started licking around the base. He kept licking around his sides, then trailing his tongue from the base to the tip.

“Pretty.”

Dongmin could hardly hear him from his heavy breathing. “Huh?”

“Your dick’s pretty.”

Dongmin held in a breath then wheezed out a laugh.

“Thank... you?” He let out a chuckle.

“It is!” Jinwoo laughed with him, looking around to avoid eye contact with Dongmin, feeling embarrassed.

It was surreal. Jinwoo was laughing with his dick in his hand. It had certainly been an interesting night.

“Okay, stop it,” Jinwoo lightly hit his thigh, his laughter still apparent in his smile. He went back to mouthing along the length of his dick. Dongmin rasped in a breath, still smiling a little and tilted his head up, covering his mouth slightly with the back of his fingers. 

Jinwoo dragged his tongue up again and took the head of his dick in his mouth. Dongmin grunted and looked down at the sight before him. Jinwoo started sucking, alternating between twirling his tongue around and taking in little by little deeper into his mouth. Dongmin’s hand was still in his hair, though not applying any pressure. It was comforting, in a more chaste way than Jinwoo thought it would be. He looked up at Dongmin from under his lashes again, his dick halfway in his mouth and took him all the way down. Dongmin exhaled, hard. He bobbed his head up and down with practiced ease. He then pulled away, continuing stimulating Dongmin with his hand and spreading his saliva around. 

“Oh fuck,” Dongmin mumbled, hunching over with his eyes closed. Jinwoo looked at him with a proud smirk. He sank his head back down on his dick, holding the base with his hand. He moved his head once, twice then pulled away. 

“Okay, get on the bed. I’d love to give you head all night but I’m determined to ride you.” He got up and pushed his tousled hair back with his clean hand. “Oh, and, you know, take off your clothes.”

Dongmin obeyed, taking off his pants and boxers. Jinwoo grabbed a condom and lube from his nightstand, then took his bathrobe off. He climbed onto Dongmin, who was lying in bed a bit awkwardly, his dick dripping with saliva. Jinwoo sat on Dongmin’s stomach, leaning down to kiss him. Dongmin trailed his hands from Jinwoo’s pecs, to his shoulder blades then to the dip of his back. He put one hand on his neck and tilted his head, deepening their kiss. Jinwoo pushed his hips back, his ass touching the other’s dick. They both gasped into the kiss. Jinwoo straightened up and grabbed the bottle of lube from his side. He poured some onto his fingers. Dongmin’s hands moved from his lower stomach to his chest. He trailed his hands over the outlines of his tattoo, squeezed his pecs and flicked his nipples. Jinwoo entered one finger inside himself, sighing with his head thrown back. He started moving his finger and his hips. 

“Hey, you don’t have to go fast,” Dongmin mumbled, his hands still moving around on his chest.

“It’s fine. I fucked myself with a dildo this morning.”

Dongmin stared at Jinwoo, his mouth slightly open at the thing Jinwoo had said so nonchalantly. 

He had thought this man was straight two hours ago.

Jinwoo entered another finger into himself, grunting and moving his hips. Dongmin’s dick twitched every time the dip of Jinwoo’s back hit his dick. Jinwoo stabled himself with a hand on Dongmin’s chest, heaving heavy breaths, his eyebrows furrowed at the pleasure he was feeling. Not just the act, the fact that he was sitting on  _ Dongmin _ ,  _ fingering himself _ turned him on so much he felt like his body was on fire. He entered a third finger in, his wrist starting to ache. Dongmin continued touching Jinwoo everywhere he could reach, loving the way the other was built and the fact that he was putting on a show for only him to see. Dongmin grabbed his thighs on each side, squeezing them. He then trailed his hands up and grabbed Jinwoo’s dick. He started moving his hand and Jinwoo’s hips jerked up. 

“Fuck. Fuck, Minnie.” He leaned over and kissed Dongmin again, desperately.

Dongmin closed his eyes and trailed his free hand up to Jinwoo’s waist, just below his other tattoo. He really did have a nice build. He focused on the feeling of having Jinwoo on him, around him, in every breath and touch.

Jinwoo shivered with the anticipation of having Dongmin’s hand  _ squeeze  _ his waist and holding him down when he started fucking him. Jinwoo  _ knew _ he was good at riding, many of his nightly escapades had told him so and he had watched himself once, with a guy that had rented out a room nearly covered in mirrors for them. He  _ knew _ he was good at it and he felt like he had something to prove to Dongmin, as well as make him feel good- beyond his wildest dreams. He wanted Dongmin to shout his name, hold him so tight it bruised and not be able to control himself and fuck into him without abandon.

“Okay,” Jinwoo heaved and pulled his fingers out. He pulled the condom out from its packaging and lifted his body up, standing on his knees, a little further back on Dongmin’s body. He rolled the condom on and poured lube over it.

He jerked him off, once, twice then held his body up and slowly sank down on the other’s length. Dongmin grunted, loud. Jinwoo sighed, his head thrown back again. When he was fully seated, he looked at Dongmin once again and smirked. He leaned down and kissed the other. 

“I’m gonna start now,” he mumbled when they seperated, a big smile on his face. Dongmin pushed Jinwoo’s hair away from his face and tucked it behind his ear. He nodded approvingly. 

Jinwoo leaned back again, steadying his hands on Dongmin’s lower abdomen. He lifted his body up, slowly, then sank back down. Dongmin held Jinwoo by his waist and Jinwoo wished he would hold on  _ tighter, harder _ until it bruised. He wanted to wake up to fingerprints around his body. He had a thing for bruising- it made him feel like everything was physical, that everything he experienced wouldn’t be left just as memories but temporary splotches on his body. It made it visible to him that he was  _ desired _ , so much so that the other couldn’t help but hurt him.

He moved up and down once again, this time a bit faster. He then moved his hips in a circle, throwing his head back then locking eyes with Dongmin. The moment he saw the raw lust in Dongmin’s eyes, he let go of any resolve he had.

He started circling his hips fast, grinding his pelvis down and rising slightly up on the other’s cock- then down. He started going at a faster pace, his breath becoming heavier and Dongmin’s hold on his waist getting tighter. 

“Holy shit,” Dongmin mumbled as Jinwoo moved to hold his upper body up by grasping Dongmin’s thigh on his back with one hand and pushing him down on his lower abdomen with the other. He continued circling his hips, alternating between moving his hips in a body roll and rising his body up with hold from his thighs.

It was a sight to see. Dongmin thought Jinwoo was a little  _ too good  _ at this. Jinwoo suddenly held onto his hand that was wrapped around his thigh and guided it to his waist.

“Oh god, mm, fuck,” Jinwoo mumbled, his moves becoming more erratic as he continued. “God, riding you feels so good. You feel so good, Minnie.” 

Dongmin wanted to kiss him with all his might but decided he would squeeze harder on Jinwoo’s waist instead. Jinwoo thought about waking up to bruises on his waist with the imprint of Dongmin’s hands and started really bouncing up and down on his dick. At some point, Dongmin held Jinwoo up by his waist and started fucking into him. Jinwoo held his hands on Dongmin’s stomach again, his chest puffing up because he was pushing his muscles together with his arms. His mouth was hanging open, small breaths leaving him, his eyes closed, focused on the sensation. 

Dongmin pushed into Jinwoo, hard, then settled his hips down. He was getting close. Jinwoo immediately went back to moving his hips forward and back, moaning with each move. He moved forward once, then back, then sat on his thighs, cumming on Dongmin’s chest. His head was thrown back as he gasped and his thighs trembled, hard. He continued moving his hips, riding out his orgasm. He slowly opened one of his eyes, then both to look at the man under him. Dongmin was breathing heavily, his hands a constant pressure on his waist, biting his lip.

Jinwoo moved faster again, though he winced a bit at his overstimulation. He looked down at Dongmin and leaned over to leave a long kiss on his cherry red lips. He rested his forehead on the other’s when they pulled away and they panted into each other’s mouths. Jinwoo straightened up, once again, with determination in his eyes. He steadied his hands on Dongmin’s stomach again, his chest puffing up. He started moving, though a bit lazier than before, when he was chasing his own orgasm. Dongmin grunted and moved his hips up and Jinwoo gasped at the feeling with a high pitched voice. He saw sweat drip down Dongmin’s forehead to his temple. He circled his hips, then moved them back and forth and Dongmin’s dick buried further into him with every motion. 

“Come for me. Come for me, Minnie.”

Dongmin had given Jinwoo time to ride out his own orgasm, but he couldn’t hold back anymore. He grabbed Jinwoo’s waist, not caring as to how hard he was squeezing, held him up and started drilling into him. Jinwoo lost his balance at Dongmin’s pace, his hands now on Dongmin’s chest, their faces closer to each other. Dongmin moved his right hand to Jinwoo’s thigh and grabbed it from its underside and continued moving into Jinwoo.

Jinwoo continually let out small “ah”s, his voice vibrating with the fast thrusts of Dongmin’s hips. Dongmin then suddenly buried deep into Jinwoo and grunted, deep and glottoral and his dick twitched as he came.

They were both panting heavily, and Dongmin loosened his grip on Jinwoo when Jinwoo fell on his chest even though it was covered with his cum. They could clean up later, he wanted to feel close to the other. Dongmin slipped out of the other when Jinwoo shifted his position and started lying on Dongmin. He hugged Jinwoo and clasped his hands on his back, instinctively wanting to hold the other close. Jinwoo smiled at the gesture.

“Fuck,” Dongmin mumbled, looking up at the ceiling then at Jinwoo, with his wet hair sticking to his forehead, his cheeks red, smiling big with his mouth open and panting. Moonlight and the light of the bathroom illuminated his face and Dongmin couldn’t help but smile.

“We’re icky,” Jinwoo chuckled, then wiggled up a little to leave a peck on Dongmin’s lips. Dongmin shifted so that Jinwoo would drop down to the bed next to him and that they were laying on their sides. He pulled Jinwoo in close and kissed the top of his head. Jinwoo was radiating heat. 

“I’ll go get baby wipes.” Dongmin kissed Jinwoo’s forehead, then his lips and separated from him, getting up and out of the bed. He tied and threw the condom in the trash and grabbed the baby wipes from the kitchen. He knew his way around Jinwoo’s apartment, from his many visits for food and playing Mortal Kombat together. 

He came back to Jinwoo after closing the bathroom’s lights, who was lying on his back with one knee raised, staring at the moonlight hitting from the windows to the floor. Dongmin’s breath hitched at the beauty in front of him. His chest rising up and down with calmer breaths now, the curve of his body with his thick thighs and black hair, he looked mesmerizing.

He didn’t want to think about what this night would mean to them tomorrow. 

He crawled onto the bed again, pulling out baby wipes from its box and wiping Jinwoo’s chest, who had turned to him with a small smile. He then wiped his own chest as Jinwoo cleaned himself then threw their garbage into the trashcan in Jinwoo’s room. Once they were done, Dongmin laid next to Jinwoo who decided to cuddle him. Apparently, Jinwoo  _ really  _ liked cuddling. Jinwoo’s body heat spread to Dongmin from where Jinwoo was latched onto him.

“You’re really warm,” Dongmin mumbled when they descended into comfortable silence. 

“Told you so.” Dongmin moved Jinwoo’s bangs away from his eyes and cradled his face with his hand. Jinwoo leaned up and kissed him chastely. “Guess I’m more useful on winter nights.” Jinwoo smiled, looking up at Dongmin with his eyes twinkling.

“Oh, you were useful tonight too,” Dongmin decided to tease and Jinwoo giggled like he did whenever he was embarrassed. 

“Well, I have to make myself useful somehow. Can’t just rely on the winters. I have to put food on the table,” Jinwoo joked. Dongmin laughed with him and leaned down to leave a long kiss on Jinwoo’s awaiting lips. 

“Did you need a sugar daddy, Jinwoo-ssi? Because I don’t think I’m financially there yet.”

“Oh, that sucks. Well, consider tonight a favor, then.”

“When were favors ever this good?” Dongmin arched his brows at Jinwoo, a smirk on his face.

“Since you met me. I made sure all my favors to you were good.  _ Really  _ good.” 

“Like the infamous kimbap incident? That sure was good. I don’t think I had ever tasted mozzarella with oyster sauce before-”

“Oh, shut up. You promised you wouldn’t make fun of me for it. I’m dumb and clueless when it comes to cooking, okay?”

“You weren’t clueless when it came to riding me though, hm?”

“I sure wasn’t. Wanted to make sure you remember tonight.” Jinwoo yawned into Dongmin’s chest. Jinwoo pulled him in closer and wrapped his legs around Dongmin’s.

“Good night, Minnie.”

“Good night, hyung.”

Jinwoo was out like a light. Dongmin thought over what had happened tonight but eventually passed out from fatigue.

  
  


Jinwoo woke up to sunlight in his eyes and Dongmin’s breath on his face. He blinked slowly and his head started pounding with a headache. His lips and mouth were dry and his eyes felt like needles were pricking them.

_ God, I know I keep saying this, but I’m never drinking again. _

He blinked more and rubbed his eyes then looked up at the man next to him, his eyes closed, breathing even. The sunlight illuminated his face and he looked like a doll. 

_ Holy shit. _

Jinwoo’s mind supplied him flashes of what had happened last night and Jinwoo felt himself blush. When he remembered saying  _ “You smell really nice. I’m going to ride you tonight.”  _ he cringed and his face contorted in pain. Drunk Jinwoo was number one public enemy.

He looked up at Dongmin and remembered how kind and understanding he had been the entire night. Jinwoo decided he’d tell everything today. He had to, at this point, where he had given only one bit of his story and his desire to Dongmin. He didn’t know how he would react but he had nowhere to run anymore. 

He stared at Dongmin for a bit longer, at the strands of his hair falling prettily, at his closed eyes with burr in the corners and his chapped lips that were slightly open. A wanton feeling to hold him close and safe and never let go wreaked through his body, causing him to shiver. Jinwoo was a little scared by how many emotions Dongmin could make him feel, by how much it consumed his being. 

His headache becoming unbearable, Jinwoo moved Dongmin’s arm away as slowly as he could and got up from the bed, constantly checking whether he woke the other up. In the end he was free without hassle. He got up and opened the doors to his wardrobe slowly, pulling out pajama bottoms and a t-shirt for himself. While he was wearing them he caught a glance of himself from the full length mirror in the corner of his room.

His hair was a mess and his face screamed  _ tired and hungover _ , but that wasn’t what had caught his attention- he was already expecting that. There were red fingerprints around his waist. He trailed over them with his fingers and turned, looking at the mirror then his body, amazed. They weren’t bruises and they would pass by tonight, he knew, but something in him lit up at the sight of the marks, knowing that they were there because of Dongmin made him even happier. He knew it was kind of fucked up how much liked marks on his body, but it never left him permanently scarred (and he wouldn’t want it to permanently scar) so he had given up on being ashamed of it a while ago. 

After admiring the redness a bit longer, his headache became unbearable so he dressed up quickly. He also pulled out a t-shirt and basketball shorts out of his wardrobe for Dongmin and set them on the bed for him to wear when he woke up.

He padded to the bathroom and splashed water on his face, rubbing his eyes. He brushed his teeth as quietly as he could and got out, gathering the cold cup of coffee from last night standing on his bed stand and getting painkillers and water in the kitchen. He leaned onto the wall and looked outside to the buildings and trees that decorated the neighborhood. The sunlight that streamed in and illuminated his countertops made him feel calmer, like the chaos of last night was a long time ago. He hoped the painkillers would take effect soon. The insistent pain on his temples was making it for him to concentrate on anything. He decided he’d make breakfast and opened his fridge. He had leftover rice from dinner and eggs and decided to make egg fried rice. 

Despite the kimbap incident, his mom had taught him five or six meals when he was going to move away for university meticulously and Jinwoo was somewhat good at them. Most of them were varities of the fried rice kind.

He set about to pull out his ingredients and heating his pan. It didn’t take him long to make this dish anymore, it had become his breakfast staple. He wanted to be quiet, to not disturb Dongmin but pulling out pots and pans proved difficult. In the end, while he was about to add the cooked egg to the rice, nearly done with the dish, Dongmin stepped into the kitchen.

“Hey,” he murmured, resting his head on the doorway, the loose clothing making him look very cozy. 

“Hi. Didn’t mean to wake you up, I’m sorry.”

Dongmin shaked his hand in a manner that indicated it didn’t bother him. His mind supplied him with an imagination of walking over to Jinwoo who was cooking, hugging him from behind and kissing the top of his head. He decided that would be left to later, when Jinwoo would explain himself. He  _ had  _ to explain himself. He instinctively felt that Jinwoo would do so and he decided not to bring it up. 

“You can get washed up while I plate these? It’s edible, I promise,” Jinwoo chuckled. 

“I’ll be the judge of that,” Dongmin joked, smiling at Jinwoo and shifting his weight from his right leg to his left. Jinwoo wanted to engrave the image of a homely Dongmin into his head. He still managed to look good after a night of drinking. 

After staring at Jinwoo for a while, with his pajamas and an apron on, Dongmin headed to the bathroom. Jinwoo kept thinking about how he would explain his situation to the other. He would tell the truth, in its entirety but to do it in a way that wouldn’t upset Dongmin was complicated. The smell of soy sauce and eggs made his stomach grumble, and he decided to focus on that instead.

When he determined his dish was cooked enough he put them in bowls and put servings on his small table that barely fit into his kitchen. He sat down and waited for Dongmin to arrive.

Dongmin walked back into the kitchen, looking more refreshed, with some water splash on the neck of his t-shirt. He offered Jinwoo a kind smile and sat down opposite him.

“Thank you,” he mumbled and picked up his spoon. Jinwoo waited for his initial reaction after his first bite.

“Hey! This is actually good!” Dongmin said, his mouth full with a smile on his face. Jinwoo laughed. 

“It’s one of the few things I  _ can  _ make.”

They started eating and Jinwoo felt his headache ease.

“Uh, do you need painkillers? You didn’t drink all that much yesterday but…”

“No, I’m fine,” Dongmin mumbled with a full mouth again. “I only get stomachaches as hangovers and they usually pass when I eat.”

“Lucky.”

Dongmin kept staring at the way Jinwoo stuck his tongue out just a little before every bite. It was one of his cutest habits. 

They ate in relative silence and the lack of conversation made Jinwoo think about yesterday’s events. He had to keep himself from visibly cringing when he remembered he  _ told _ Dongmin that he had used his dildo that morning. 

_ Was it pertinent information, Park Jinwoo? Did you  _ have  _ to say that? It didn’t even add anything- that was so unnecessary why did you do that- _

“Hey,” Dongmin’s voice broke through his inner ramblings. “You’re thinking.”

Jinwoo looked up at Dongmin and swallowed his food. “Oh, you know. Things. I need to… explain myself to you, so…”

“Let’s eat first, then,” Dongmin offered him a smile. Jinwoo nodded approvingly. 

They finished their meals, Dongmin expectant as to what would come next. He was hopeful, in his heart of hearts, because Jinwoo had obviously desired him and he, himself had made his own intentions clear from the beginning. Though a spark of realist evil in his brain said  _ ‘you were hopeful before. It ended in heartbreak. Don’t expect anything,’  _ he decided he wouldn’t listen to that thought.

After they were done, Jinwoo cleaned up the table and put the dishes in the dishwasher, then sat back down timidly. All the while Dongmin just watched him, a small smile on his face. He  _ loved _ domestic Jinwoo, he decided. He wanted to see this every morning of his life. The thought was scary, intimidating but made Dongmin’s heart feel like it was being flooded by affection.

“So,” Jinwoo started, his hands between his thighs again, his eyes searching the room to avoid eye contact.  _ Puppy. He looks like a scolded puppy. _

“I lied. I’m sorry. I already told you that. I’m not straight.” Jinwoo gulped.

“Yeah. You  _ demonstrated _ last night,” Dongmin mused, his arms crossed, leaning back on his chair. 

Jinwoo closed his eyes, took a deep breath and licked his lips. Jinwoo licked his lips a lot. Even more so when he was shy or stressed. Dongmin thought it was adorable. 

“I lied because… it seemed like an easy way to reject you. To give you a situation no one could do anything about.”

Dongmin didn’t say anything and continued listening to the other, his arms now on his side, his head tilted. Jinwoo  _ felt _ Dongmin’s focus on him and it made him even more embarrassed.

“And I… rejected you because…” he bit on his lip, thinking of ways to phrase his sentence. 

“Because you’re Lee Dongmin and I’m Park Jinwoo.”

Dongmin arched his eyebrow at that but didn’t say anything.

“Well, yeah. You’re  _ Lee Dongmin _ , you know. You already started your career, everyone wants to know more about you and you’re… sought after. I’m- I’m just me.”

Jinwoo sipped on his glass of water.

“You know what’s wrong with that assumption, right? You know that it’s just- wrong.”

Jinwoo finally made eye contact with Dongmin, who didn’t look angry or like he was judging him. Jinwoo knew he would never do that. He felt even more scrutinized  _ because _ Dongmin wouldn’t do that.

“I… I do? I know it isn’t… the most logical thing ever but I… can’t let go of the idea. I mean, you’re just so- you’re just so Dongmin and I’m so Jinwoo, I didn’t think we would work out. I didn’t even think we’d be in a position you liked me anyway.”

Dongmin leaned on the table with his forearms and kept looking straight at Jinwoo, which made him ruffle his hair and lick his lips nervously.

“I like you  _ because  _ you’re so Jinwoo. I like  _ so much _ about you it drives me insane sometimes,” Dongmin chuckled. “You know you’re wonderful, right? Aside from your personality, you’re ranked number one in your department, people line up for tutoring from you and you have much,  _ much _ more connections than I do. You’re working your way to your career, just as me. I know you  _ know _ this.”

“Yeah. I know it’s stupid to compare us, but I went and did it anyway and now… we’re here.”

“Were you satisfied that you rejected me?”

Dongmin had his hands interlocked and resting on the table now. He looked at Jinwoo with a curious gaze, nothing to show that he was judging, or unhappy. 

“I tried to be… at first. I missed you. I missed you a lot. When you seemed to be moving on, it- it hurt. I knew I had made a mistake but I had no idea how to solve it. I thought I was too late.”

“So you decided to get drunk and hit on me?” Dongmin laughed again. Jinwoo hit his arm.

“I didn’t  _ decide  _ that! MJ-hyung coerced me into drinking and you know… drunk me. I hate him.” His breath picked up as he talked. “I acted as I always did; on every impulse I have at any moment. I really shouldn’t go near alcohol again. I really-”

Dongmin put a finger on Jinwoo’s mouth. “You’re rambling.”

Jinwoo pulled away and ruffled his hair. “Yeah.”

“So, it was just miscommunication.” Dongmin smiled, tilting his head, adoration apparent in his eyes. Jinwoo felt his breath hitch at the beauty in front of him.”Then I’m asking you once again; hyung, I like you. Would you date me?” 

Jinwoo looked up at Dongmin, a smile forming on his face.

“Yes, Dongmin-ah. I would love to date you.”

Dongmin smiled, then giggled. He grabbed Jinwoo’s hand and held it in between his, kissing his knuckles. He kept giggling. 

“That was so easy. It should’ve been as easy as that,” Jinwoo mumbled, not able to separate his eyes from Dongmin’s smile.

“So, can I get my first kiss as your official boyfriend, then?”

Jinwoo giggled then got up from his seat, making Dongmin get up too. He snuggled in close, grabbed Dongmin by the neck of his t-shirt, got on his tiptoes and pressed his lips onto the taller’s. Dongmin put one hand on his lower back and one on his shoulder blades, wrapping his arms around Jinwoo. When his hands trailed over Jinwoo’s waist, Jinwoo jumped instinctively. Dongmin didn’t seem to mind and they continued kissing. When they seperated, Jinwoo cuddled into Dongmin’s chest and listened to his heartbeat.

“What was that for?” Dongmin asked, amused.

“What was what?” 

“You jumped.”

“Oh, I just got surprised.”

“By what?”

“I’m just a jumpy person-”

Dongmin trailed his hands to Jinwoo’s waist again and Jinwoo gave the exact same response.

“Can I look at your waist?”

Jinwoo bit his lip. “Yeah, sure.” He lifted his shirt up and showed the fading redness.

“Oh my god, hyung, I’m sorry. Do they hurt? Can we apply a creme or-”

“No, they don’t hurt.” 

Dongmin looked apologetic, his eyebrows furrowed in worry.

“Don’t apologize. I… I like them.”  _ I like even more than that.  _ “They’ll fade by tonight, don’t worry.”

Dongmin continued looking sad until he thought of something. Jinwoo saw a metaphorical light bulb pop up next to his head.

“Wait, I saw you looking at them this morning. I just kind of forgot about it because it was in between my sleep. You were trailing over them. Hyung, are you kinky? Is that a kink for you?” Dongmin’s face was halfway curious, halfway laughing. 

Jinwoo blushed and pulled his shirt down. “It’s too soon to talk about kinks, okay! We just got together a minute ago!” Jinwoo turned around and started walking to the entryway of the house to grab his phone. Dongmin trailed behind him,: first by pulling on the sleeve of his t-shirt then by backhugging the other.

“You weren’t saying that when you were riding me last night. I can’t believe you’re into that, well I actually can, you kept guiding my hand to your waist. And it’s never too early to talk about kinks, what else do you like-”

“Lee Dongmin!”

“It was Minnie last night.” Jinwoo blushed and started pushing away from Dongmin. “Hey, no! I like that petname!”

Jinwoo chuckled and pulled his phone out from his bag, to a wall of text by Myungjun.

  
  


**MJ-hyung:** hey

**MJ-hyung:** HEEEY

**MJ-hyung:** THEYRE PAEYING FROMMY WALET THS ISNT FAIR PAK JIWNOO

**MJ-hyung:** GTE OUTOF TE FOOKIN TOILTE

(12:46 AM)

**MJ-hyung:** u good?

**MJ-hyung:** are you home?

**MJ-hyung:** i have the worst headache ever

**MJ-hyung:** we should go eat haejangguk

**MJ-hyung:** HEEEEY

**MJ-hyung:** are u still sleeping

**MJ-hyung:** omg

**MJ-hyung:** wake up u dumbass

(11:03 AM)

**MJ-hyung:** ANSWER MY FUCKING TEXTS PARK JINWOO

**MJ-hyung:** i had to order in bc u wouldnt answer :((

**MJ-hyung:** cant believe ur still sleeping

**MJ-hyung:** the others really did pay from my wallet >-<

**MJ-hyung:** ill have to take this out of them

**MJ-hyung:** they told me dongmin was taking care of u so im not too worried~~

**MJ-hyung:** but text me when u get up

(12:37 PM)

**Me:** hey

**Me:** im up

**Me:** and im fine

**Me:** they did right by making u pay it was ur idea lol

(1:12 PM)

Dongmin had perched his head on his shoulder, snuggling close to him and looking around. Jinwoo put his phone down and turned around. He captured Dongmin’s face in his hand and stroked his cheekbone lightly with his thumb. He left a peck on his lips then rested his forehead on the other’s, their noses touching. Jinwoo was giggling with excitement that he could do this whenever he wanted to now. 

“What should we do today? Do you have any work?” Jinwoo asked, their breaths mingling. 

“No, I finished all my assignments early for yesterday’s get-together. We could just chill at home. Or we could go to the movies, there’s a new romcom I’ve been meaning to watch.”

“I guess we can stay at home for now, we can look at showcase times later.” 

Jinwoo held Dongmin’s hand in his own securely and guided them to his living room. Dongmin’s soft fingers felt so  _ right _ in between his, he thought he must’ve been completely crazy to ever refuse this, for any reason.

They sat on the couch and Jinwoo grabbed the remote, cuddling into Dongmin’s side where he had opened up space by resting his hand on the couch’s backrest. Jinwoo flipped channels and landed on a rerun of  _ Knowing Bros. _

They watched in relative silence, though Dongmin kept snuggling into Jinwoo’s head and kissing him. It made Jinwoo giddy and return his kisses. They weren’t really watching the show, instead trailing their hands on each other, cuddling and kissing. Dongmin thought Jinwoo’s lips were warm enough to scorch his entire body.

“Sit on my lap,” Dongmin prompted with a neutral look.

“Huh?”

“Sit on my lap. I’ve always wanted you to do that.”

Jinwoo was about to tell him something but he was interrupted by his phone ringing in his bag. He got up to get it and Dongmin trailed him, holding him by the hem of his shirt. It was Myungjun calling.

“Hey! How long did you sleep for man, I had to order in because of you.”

“Sorry hyung, I was kind of busy.”

Jinwoo had stood where he had picked up his phone, aware of every ministration Dongmin was doing around him. He was hugging him from behind with his head on his shoulder again. Jinwoo couldn’t help but smile.

“Busy with what? What could you be busy with? Did you get home fine last night-”

“Hyuung,” Dongmin drawled into his left ear. “You were supposed to sit on my lap.”

Before Jinwoo had time to react, Myungjun had started firing questions.

“Hey, is that, is that Dongmin?! What does he mean ‘sit on my lap’, Jinwoo what did you do?! What happened last night?!” Myungjun’s excitement was apparent from his voice.

Dongmin started dragging Jinwoo back to the living room by whining and pulling on his arm as Myungjun talked in his ear. He sat down then pulled Jinwoo into the couch, into his lap. Jinwoo couldn’t help but giggle with him.

“Uh, since you checked in with me, I’ve gotta hang up now- Minnie, stop,” Jinwoo giggled more as Dongmin maneuvered him to really sit on his lap, their faces inches away. “Bye.”

“MINNIE?! You gave him a NICKNAME?! Park Jinwoo, I swear to god-”

Jinwoo hung up. 

“Hey, what’d you do that for?” Jinwoo playfully hit his chest, moving his legs so they were closed around Dongmin’s waist.

“I wanted you to sit on my lap. Now you do,” Dongmin smiled proudly. He kissed the tip of Jinwoo’s nose. Jinwoo giggled, for the umpeteenth time today, and fixed Dongmin’s bangs. Dongmin’s hands were clenched behind his back. 

“Cute.”

Jinwoo stared at the eyebags on Dongmin’s face, his bright smile with his t-shirt a bit crooked, his hair mussed because of how they moved and fell in love all over again. The Dongmin on billboards, the Dongmin people whispered about could be theirs; this Dongmin, this cozy Dongmin with his eyes shining and his breath smelling like the egg fried rice they’d eaten earlier was all his. 

“You’re cuter,” Jinwoo knew they were being cheesy, though he found it acceptable to be cheesy in their first hour as a couple.

“No. You’re the puppy one.”

Jinwoo laughed.

“How often do you think that about me?”

“Every time I see you get playfully frustrated. Or embarrassed. Or shy. Or guilty. Or happy. Or sad. You’re always a puppy.”

Jinwoo breathed out a chuckle. He put his hands in front of his chest and stuck his tongue out, breathing like a dog. Dongmin laughed and patted his head. “Good boy!”

They laughed together again. Jinwoo kissed the other then snuggled into his chest, completely enwrapping him. He likes listening to Dongmin’s heartbeat, he decided. They were sitting in comfortable silence once again, Dongmin patting Jinwoo’s back with his thumb. Jinwoo’s phone started making noise with messages and he reached to check them, though he got back to his position.

“The others are in a cafe, apparently. MJ-hyung is  _ demanding _ we be there. Do you want to go?”

Jinwoo lifted his head up to look at Dongmin. 

“Sure.”

They shared a kiss again. 

“I could carry you to the bedroom.”

“Maybe you should leave that for tonight,” Jinwoo laughed and got up from his lap. Dongmin pouted. 

“I didn’t mean it in a sexual way! I just like you being in my lap.”

“I know, Minnie. But I can walk.”

Dongmin continued pouting and followed Jinwoo into his bedroom to change. 

“You can carry me later, I promise,” Jinwoo mused at Dongmin’s pout.

“Fine.” Dongmin grabbed Jinwoo’s face and kissed him passionately. Jinwoo was blushing.

“Uh. I can give you clothing, if you don’t want to wear what’s from yesterday,” Jinwoo mumbled, scratching his neck.

“Uh, sure.” Dongmin looked at his crumpled shirt and jeans, smelling of soju in the corner.

Jinwoo opened his wardrobe and started searching with his eyes. He pulled out a white t-shirt and black jeans.

“These are a bit too long for me so I think they’ll fit,” he gestured the items towards Dongmin. Dongmin grabbed them and undressed. Jinwoo’s gaze unconsciously lingered on Dongmin, on the small hickey under his collarbone. The sunlight illuminating the room made Dongmin’s skin glow. Jinwoo gulped as Dongmin pulled his jeans up and wore his t-shirt. When he was finished, he turned to look at Jinwoo which made him blink and return to reality.

Jinwoo grabbed a polo shirt and ripped jeans for himself and timidly took his shirt off.

“You’re staring,” he mumbled.

“It’s my turn.”

Jinwoo looked at Dongmin with wide eyes, embarrassed, then continued dressing up. When he was done, Dongmin got up from where he was seated and walked over to him, then left a peck on his lips. Jinwoo smiled, wide.

“I keep wanting to kiss you,” Dongmin mumbled, their noses touching.

“You can. As much as you like.” Jinwoo leaned in and kissed him. Their hands were entangled, standing in the middle of the room, just listening to each other breathing.

“Okay, we’ve gotta go or they’re going to be mad,” Dongmin muttered, still not stepping away from the other. 

“Fine,” Jinwoo kissed Dongmin once more. He pulled away and they walked to the entry of the house, wearing their shoes.

They started to walk to the bus stop and started talking, just as they would months before. It was easy, too easy, to ease into their conversation with Dongmin, Jinwoo thought.

“So were you going to just, act straight? Why did you even lie?” Dongmin joked.

“I- I don’t know! I thought it was… believable. I really fit the straight stereotype.” Jinwoo chuckled.

“Yeah. You even have ‘I caught a fish’ photos. That is  _ beyond _ .”

“You’re the one who confessed to the straight-stereotype, dummy.”

“I guess that  _ was  _ on me.” They laughed again.

They boarded the bus and were lucky enough to find empty seats. Jinwoo offered the window seat to Dongmin, he knew he liked it a lot. They held hands under the seat and smiled at each other. The bus was pretty empty so Jinwoo rested his head on Dongmin’s shoulder and they started watching the streets pass by together. The weather was slowly turning to summer and Seoul was warming up, with its flowers, trees and AC turned on in most places. Jinwoo was glad he was entering summer with Dongmin by his side. Even with cherry blossoms and exams to keep him busy, April had been lonely. He squeezed the other’s hand. 

“They’re gonna tease us a lot,” Dongmin mumbled, turning his head slightly to look at Jinwoo.

“Probably. Especially me. They bothered me so much when you were gone.”

“Apparently you were always pouting- that’s what Minhyuk said.”

Jinwoo frowned jokingly. “Maybe. Maybe I was missing you.”

Dongmin laughed.

“Dummy. If you had talked to me, I would’ve started hanging out with you again.”

“I had just rejected you! I thought I’d… give you time and space.”

“You did. Don’t know if it worked. I kept trying to get over you and was lying to myself. I was still falling asleep to fantasies of- well I won’t expose myself here.”

“What? What? Fantasies of what? Lee Dongmin I did  _ not  _ know you were this horny-”

“They weren’t horny! I imagined-” Dongmin sighed, then chuckled. “I imagined hugging you and kissing you. Falling asleep with you in my arms. Waking up to the sight of you. Feeding you strawberries. I don’t know.” He chuckled again.

“Strawberries?”

“Yeah. I know you like them a lot. Remember when on your birthday, you were eating the strawberries off the cake but the others just ate all of them? I was so angry, I wanted to buy you crates of strawberries.”

Jinwoo laughed. “Oh my  _ god _ , you’re so cheesy. I wasn’t that sad, I’d forgotten about it until now.”

“No,” Dongmin whined. “You were pouting and just kept looking at the others eat. You didn’t even eat the cake. It made me so upset.”

Jinwoo lightened up. “Now I remember! You even asked me if I wanted another cake while we were eating. You were so insistent, it was so cute.”

Dongmin blushed.

“We can buy some on our way home,” he opted to say, embarrassed by how whipped he was for Jinwoo even then. Jinwoo resisted every single urge in himself to kiss his cheek.

They finally got off at the right stop and started walking to the cafe. The door tinkled when they opened it and Dongmin immediately captured Jinwoo’s hand into his. They walked over to the others that were sitting around a long table in padded chairs. They were laughing about something until the couple arrived, when they all turned to stare. The two sat into the chairs left out for them, still holding hands. Jinwoo blushed.

“Sorry for being late, this place is kinda far from my place,” Jinwoo said. No one said anything in response. Bin was the one to break the silence.

“So you two are dating now, is that right? MJ-hyung told us some stuff but it was hard to believe. You guys looked so cold yesterday.”

Yesterday’s event flashed in front of Jinwoo’s eyes.  _ Yeah, we definitely weren’t cold. _

“I told you! Dongmin even said ‘hyung~, sit on my lap’. Jinwoo giggled and called him Minnie!”

“Yeah, we are dating now,” Dongmin announced, squeezing Jinwoo’s hand instinctively.

“Oh my god. I don’t think I can handle another couple around me. These two,” Sanha motioned to Bin and Minhyuk, “are already enough. Keep the PDA to a minimum,  _ please _ , I beg of you.”

“Hey, it’s only you and me left Sanha-yah. What do you say we couple up too?” Myungjun joked, making kissy faces at the other. Sanha pushed him away and screamed. They all laughed at the two.

“Hey, do you want to eat anything?” Jinwoo asked, turning to Dongmin.

“Hm. We could eat some sweets. Let’s go look at what they have.” Dongmin rose from his seat and lifted Jinwoo up by his hand. They walked over to the display of desserts.

“Oh my god. They really are finally dating. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Jinwoo-hyung this happy,” Minhyuk mumbled.

“I’m glad they solved whatever their problem was, but I feel like they’re going to be really cheesy,” Bin mumbled, taking a sip of his iced coffee.

“Ugh, of course they’re gonna be,” Myungjun scoffed. “Jinwoo couldn’t go an hour without thinking about him, it was driving me crazy. They’re going to be so sappy. Oh god, heartbroken Jinwoo might be the worst but head over heels in love Jinwoo is something else.”

“For some reason, I feel like this is your fault,” Sanha motioned at the Myungjun then at the couple, giggling and looking at cakes together. “I’m gonna throw up on  _ you _ if I can’t handle it.”

“Hey! What’s that gotta do with me, it was Dongmin who first confessed to Jinwoo!”

“Dongmin was the first to confess?” Bin asked, shocked.

“It was obvious, Bin-ah. He was the one fluttering around Jinwoo-hyung all the time.”

“Hyung was fluttering around him too, he kept hanging out around the drama department to see him.” Bin muttered excitedly at his boyfriend. “He started going to the  _ library _ . Frequently. Dongmin had him wrapped around his finger.”

“Why are you guys gossiping about us?” Dongmin interrupted their banter, sitting down on his seat as Jinwoo walked over with a tray filled with two cups and a slice of chocolate cake.

“You guys are the new hot couple. The entire campus is going to be talking about you,” Bin muttered. Dongmin shrugged. Jinwoo walked over and Dongmin beamed at him, grabbing the tray and pushing Jinwoo’s chair away so that he could sit. Jinwoo gave one of the cups to Dongmin and waited for him to take a sip.

“Is it good?” he asked, which Dongmin answered by enthusiastically shaking his head. Jinwoo smiled, big, his eyes disappearing.

“Ugh. Look at them. I’m never getting my best friend back,” Myungjun mumbled, dramatically falling into his chair.

“Hey! Who said anything about that!”

“God, Jinwoo-yah, you haven’t shut up about him in  _ months _ and now that he’s with you I’m afraid I must mourn the death of our friendship. Here lies MyungJin, a story never told.”

“You’re so fucking dramatic,” Jinwoo joked. He then grabbed a fork and took a piece off the cake as did Dongmin and they both turned to each other, forks pointing at the other’s mouths to feed. They looked at the coincidence and laughed. 

“My turn first,” Jinwoo muttered in between his giggles and pointed his fork at Dongmin again, who ate the piece of cake, smiling. Then, Dongmin fed Jinwoo and wiped a piece of the cake that smushed around his lips with his thumb. He then licked his thumb, earning a laugh and a punch from Jinwoo. Sanha made throwing up sounds from next to them.

“I’m so sorry Bin-hyung I ever said anything to you. These two are the  _ worst _ .”

“We’ll see how you act if you ever get a girlfriend, Sanha,” Dongmin joked.

“I’ll never be like you guys! I have  _ self-respect  _ and  _ dignity _ -”

“Hey, remember when Sanha serenaded a girl that had turned him down two times then proceeded to get drunk and spam like her entire Instagram page?” Dongmin joked, turning to the others. “That was funny-”

“Hyung!” Sanha shrieked. “We’re friends with Seolhyun now, please.”

“It’s a miracle, truly. You even made a banner for her dance competition, with hearts and all,” Myungjun remarked, sipping on his coffee. Jinwoo continued feeding Dongmin. Dongmin smiled at him then leaned over to grab tissues, his shirt riding a bit down because of the table.

“That- that’s a hickey!” Myungjun excitedly pointed at Dongmin’s collarbone. “Jinwoo did you two  _ fuck _ -”

Jinwoo sighed, his cheeks turning red.  _ He really does wear his heart on his sleeve _ , Dongmin thought and his heart filled with adoration.

“Yes, we did! I don’t think it’s surprising-”

“When did you find the  _ time _ to fuck- oh my god, was it yesterday?” Myungjun gasped, closing his mouth with his fingers. “Drunk Jinwoo was at it again, I see. This is why we never go clubbing with you anymore. I guess we can’t go any time soon either-”

“Wait, what’s up with ‘drunk Jinwoo’?” Minhyuk asked. “Hyung, never gets drunk around us and yesterday he was basically like you.”

“Oh, drunk Jinwoo, he,” Myungjun snorted. “He’s horny. So horny. Out of this world-”

“Okay! That’s enough about my sex life!” Jinwoo shot up, his ears turning pink. Dongmin laughed at him. He leaned into Jinwoo’s ear.

“Maybe you should get drunk again tonight,” he mumbled, pulling away with a smirk.

Jinwoo pulled Dongmin in by the neck of his t-shirt. “I don’t need alcohol to fuck you anymore, Dongmin-ah.” He shot a daring look at Dongmin. Dongmin thought it was a nice dichotomy, between his red ears and his smirk.

“Please stop horny-whispering next to me,” Sanha mumbled, faking a cry. Dongmin laughed.

They continued their conversation, the new couple shooting each other loving gazes every now and then. They were the main targets for teasing today, it seemed, but Jinwoo was used to that. Dongmin thought it was fun to see Jinwoo whipped but also embarrassed about it. 

Bin and Minhyuk were the first to leave, after they sat for hours, saying they needed to practice a routine. Then it was Myungjun, having to go to a get-together for his final project, then Sanha, who had to go to a meetup with his friends at an internet cafe. Dongmin and Jinwoo sat around a bit more, slowly talking about whatever came to mind. Then they left the cafe too and started walking towards the bus stop they initially came from.

“Hey. Let’s go to mine tonight. Plus, I promised you strawberries,” Dongmin tugged on Jinwoo’s arm. 

“Well, I had to do laundry… but okay,” Jinwoo agreed and they started walking in the opposite direction. Luckily, Dongmin’s house was close-by. They went into a convenience store on their way and Dongmin bought the promised strawberries. Surprisingly, even though it wasn’t the right season for strawberries yet, the ones they’d bought were sweet and tasty. They had sat down in swings in a park near Dongmin’s apartment. They were sharing the boxed strawberries, though it was mostly Dongmin feeding Jinwoo. Dongmin thought he looked adorable with his chunky sneakers, bright smile, flat straight bangs almost to his eyes and his lips shining red from the fruit. 

“I wanna give the world to you for the happiness you give me, hyung,” Dongmin blurted out, his eyes twinkling with infatuation.

“Your time... and presence is more than enough, Minnie,” Jinwoo responded. He picked up a strawberry from the box Dongmin was holding out and chewed around the green stem, giggling and swaying a bit in the swing. Dongmin etched the memory to his brain, one out of the many he wanted to remember.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are very much appreciated! I know this isn't... all that good, not the best thing I've ever written but I wrote it completely self-indulgent so I don't really care whether it's good in the literary sense. It's basically my crying and whining about Jinwoo reflected onto Eunwoo. Hope you enjoyed.


End file.
